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I have been running around this past week like a chicken with my head cut off. (My mother used to tell me about getting chickens prepared for eating, and I used to think she was joking with me, but they do actually run around after their heads have been cut off!)
Anyway, we have had family visiting this week, from Colorado and we have been on the go each and every day. They will be heading home on Friday, so life will slow down a little bit then. I want to apologize to everyone for not reading blogs during this time. I just haven't had the time to do it! I will try to catch up with things, but obviously, there will be some that I will miss out on reading just because I don't have the time.
One of the trips we have taken while our family is visiting is to Amish country. I am so used to the Amish being around because I live in an area where there are some. So it is no big deal to me, but it is a big deal for those who don't get to be around it much. However, the Amish way of life is becoming more and more commercialized. Especially in the little tourist towns around here. Just like everything else, people see the dollar as something of value, and want to get a piece of the action. They cater to the tourists, and do what they think would "sell". It is sad for me to see how these small little towns have grown through the years, with all of the tourists that come in. I guess that is a way of life though. But the Amish way of life cannot exactly be categorized as a quiet little life anymore, at least not in these touristy towns. It is a big business now.
I don't exactly have a direction for this blog, just wanted to share a little bit of my time this past week. I hope to be back to reading blogs this weekend. Until then, may all of you be blessed!
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ORW, Ohio Reformatory for Women. That is where I spent part of my day today. I have been writing to a few ladies there, and one in particular I have been writing for several months, and have gotten to know pretty well through those letters. She will be getting out of prison next month, and wanted to meet me before she did.
Let me tell you, this is not a comfort zone for me. I was TERRIFIED to go. I put off sending in my application, until I couldn't avoid it anymore. I put off calling to set up a visitation once my application was approved. She kept pushing me (which is what she needed to do since I obviously was dragging my feet), and I finally just did it, but even up to the last minute I wanted to back out. I have never visited a prison before. Never even gotten close to one...other than MANCI which is a prison not too far from where we live. (Mansfield Correctional Institution). When I started writing letters to prisoners, I never wanted to go visit any of them. No way. Not me. All I can say is Never Say Never. God had other ideas.
I woke up early, and had stomach problems from the get go. I could have easily said I was sick and not gone. I had my out. I ended up having stomach problems all day. While I was there I had to make two quick trips to the rest room, and one of those times I really thought I was going to pass out. Whether it was nerves, or a bug, or something I ate, I do not know. All I know is I felt pretty lousy. But I am so glad that I went. This lady is delightful, full of hope at getting out, and I really think she will make it. At least I hope and pray that she will. I will continue to maintain contact with her and help her if I can.
It was an interesting day, aside from just visiting this lady. The whole process of going in to a prison was new to me. I knew I couldn't take anything in...except my keys, and the money I had to spend at the vending machines had to be put into a machine and transferred onto a card. I had to go through a metal detector, pull my pockets inside out, and roll up my pant legs to make sure I wasn't carrying a concealed weapon.
There were many visitors, but the ones that caught my eye were two, obviously lesbian ladies, one visiting the other. It was pretty obvious that they were, and the lady I was visiting mentioned it.
Let's face it, the majority of people in prison are there because they did something wrong, made poor choices, not living lives with Christ at the forefront (with the exception of Scott, for those of you following Bubbles' blogs). I am sure that there are some there who are falsely accused. This lady that I visited, was guilty, she has done her time and will soon get out. But she will carry this blot on her record forever.
Wouldn't it be something if every sin we ever committed was written in a log, for everyone to see, perhaps stamped on our forehead, or on a sign around our neck? She cannot do anything in life without having to remember or mention her past. I.E. getting a job, dating someone, renting an apartment, buying a home...it is a matter of public record and will be with her forever. Aren't we lucky that God doesn't do that with us, once we have accepted Him as our Savior? Our slate is wiped clean, and we are free. Were it so easy with people as it were with Him.
My day is done, and I am glad that this visit is in the past. I don't know if I will go again, but I know that I can if I am called to do so. Thank you Jesus for getting me through the day.
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It is so easy for a marriage to end. One or both of the partners wants out and they can have it as soon as they file the papers. Is it just me, or does that seem wrong? Should it be so easy to get a divorce?
Not that it is easy to go through a divorce. I've never been there, but I have seen the way it affects people who really don't want out of the marriage. Yet when one partner wants out, there is really little anyone can do to stop it. And when anger or hurt is what is feeding your actions, then it is easy to be motivated to end the relationship. And let's face it, working through problems is ugly...I do know that for a fact because I HAVE been there!
I am watching the ending of a marriage between two Christian friends of mine. A couple that, by all appearances, was a happily married couple, who seemed so in love. They kissed or hugged often in public, seemed to get along, not fighting that I have ever seen publicly. Yet, when one did something wrong, the other got fed up and left. No more chances, I'm done with you, I want out.
How can it be so easy to throw it all away? Especially when you have two people that are Christians; who have made a vow before God until death they do part. Yes, one of the partners did something wrong, but if we are Christians the thing we need to do is forgive, and move on. Get marital counseling, work things out, but never, ever get a divorce, unless there is physical abuse. Is it just me that feels that way, or is that how it should be? You make the commitment before God, you stick with it, no matter how rough the road gets. Even if you think you have made a mistake in getting married in the first place?
And shouldn't it be harder to get married? Shouldn't we have to pass some test of endurance before we walk down that aisle, to make sure that we are ready and mature enough to get married? People just don't take marriage seriously anymore. It's too easy to get into it, and too easy to get out should something go wrong.
I will be married 25 years this September. Do you think it has been easy? NO!!!!! Do you think there haven't been times that either one of us has wanted to walk out and end the marriage? Of course there have! We almost did too. But to our credit, we stuck it out, got the help we so desperately needed from someone who knew how to help us, and we made it through, by the Grace of God.
I tried talking to both partners in this marriage that is ending, imploring them to get counseling, telling them to not do anything hasty, but it was of no use. Their minds were made up, and now they appear to have moved on. But it leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth. So easy to throw a relationship away, and not only that, but two children are involved as well. I have prayed and prayed on this situation, and can't help but feel that this is not what God wants, but yet it is moving forward. Their marriage will officially be over at the end of the month. And I am just left shaking my head at the sadness of it all, the futility of it all.
I know I have done all I could, and God will have to take it from here. But still, it just makes me so sad...
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Patience is not a strong point of mine. Conversely, impatience is something I excel at! I hate delays. I used to have a voice on my computer, and when you hit a snag on a web page, it would say "delays, delays, nothing but delays". That is what I say all the time.
I hate waiting in line at the grocery store, the amusement park, the bank, the post office, the "fast" food lane...I hate being stuck in traffic, waiting on mail orders to arrive, waiting in a doctors office, waiting on Christmas...waiting, waiting, waiting. Doesn't it seem sometimes like our lives are made up of a whole lot of waiting? Seems as if every major event in life requires a waiting period. You have to wait nine months to have a baby (or be born), wait to go to school, wait to be old enough to drive, wait to graduate, wait to get married, wait all year for a one or two week vacation, wait to retire, wait to die, wait to get to heaven...and the cycle goes on and on...
I remember when my husband and I were first married, we bought a new couch. We had to order the color that we wanted, so it would be a couple of weeks before it came in and could be delivered. In the meantime, we sold the couch we had, and decided we could use our bean bag chairs to sit on instead of the couch. Our landlady was going to have to let the delivery men in to the apartment, since we were both at work. The day it was scheduled to arrive, they brought the couch...but it was the wrong color. The landlady sent it back. Another week later, another couch comes, but the landlady notices a big black mark across the back of it, so she sends that one back. (Remember, we are still sitting in bean bag chairs!) Finally, on the third try, we get the right color couch, with no black marks, and in perfect condition.
I grew so frustrated and impatient during that time. As I look back over my life, I realize that there were many times when I had to wait on something...like the year we ordered a new car. We ordered it because it was cheaper to do it that way, since Jim's dad worked for General Motors, but by ordering it, it takes forever to come in! I practically went insane waiting!
Waiting is also something we have to do in our spiritual lives. When we first accept Jesus as our Savior, we want to know it all right now. At least I know I did. But it takes time to grow and mature in our faith, and the more time that passes the more mature and wise we become. Waiting is also something we have to do at times with our prayers. Sometimes it seems like forever before God finally answers us.
My whole life has been one big lesson in patience. I believe it is something that God really wants me to know, and understand, and practice in every aspect of my life, and so He keeps giving me lessons on it, and apparently I haven't passed to His satisfaction yet, because He continues to challenge me in that area. Hopefully, by the time my life on this earth ends, I will be a student graduating with honors in patience.
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Years ago, I was still living with my parents. My father usually had to have the roto rooter company come out to clean out our drains, because inevitably every year they would back up into the basement because of tree roots growing into the drainage tiles. Not a pretty sight!
One year, the drains backed up, and the roto rooter man came out and did his thing. Within the week, the drains were backing up again. The roto rooter man came back out, because they have a guarantee that if it isn’t done right the first time they will come back out. When he tried to clean them out the second time, he ran into mud. He told my dad that he needed to have the tiles replaced, and that he would not be back. So my dad called some other company to service the drain, and they ran into mud too, and told him the same thing and that they would not be back.
My father proceeded to fuss and be angry that no one wanted to clean out his drain. (I have often wondered if the Roto Rooter man called other similar businesses and warned them about my father!) He just could not accept the fact that he was going to have to have the yard torn up and replace the sewer tile. He fought it tooth and nail, and worried until he made himself sick, and my mother worried right along with him. This last time when he had so much trouble and found out what needed to be done, I was already out of the house and married. I was so shocked at how obsessed they both were over having to go through this. They worried worse than I have ever known anyone to worry. They could not sleep, could not eat, and it was all they could talk about. The worry took control of their lives. What good did it do? None, it only did harm in making them sick because they were so worried.
The bible tells us not to worry:
6:25 "Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you shall eat or what you shall drink, nor about your body, what you shall put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 6:26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 6:27 And which of you by being anxious can add one cubit to his span of life? 6:28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they neither toil nor spin; 6:29 yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 6:30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O men of little faith? 6:31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 6:32 For the Gentiles seek all these things; and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 6:33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things shall be yours as well. 6:34 "Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Let the day's own trouble be sufficient for the day.
I am fortunate to have gotten over my worrying. Sure I still do it on occasion, but I try not to let things bother me so much that I cannot sleep or eat, or become so obsessed with it that it is all I can think about. Perhaps seeing my parents go through that and realizing how futile it really is to worry, helped me to stop doing it. I am also certain that becoming a Christian helped me with that as well. I usually just say “God take it” if I am fretting about something in particular.
I always think of the serenity prayer whenever I start to worry…particularly:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
If my parents would have put that into practice, they might have added a few years to their lives. Instead they worried themselves sick over every problem that came their way.
Let’s face it, life gives us plenty to worry about. We can either let it drag us down with the weight of worry, or we can lift it into God’s more than capable hands. Always ask yourself if you can change anything, then set about doing it, but if you can’t change anything, then just pray more earnestly, and move on. What will happen will happen whether you are worrying or not!
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