Have you ever visited a church that wasn't "friendly"? Most churches advertise that they are friendly and/or welcoming but is friendly what non-church members are really looking for?

While you think about that let me tell you the following story about my father. It was a typical Sunday morning at our church, my father had finished singing with the choir and came down from the balcony to join me where I was sitting. As we finished singing the closing hymn and the last note was being played my father turned around to the visitor sitting behind us and commented on the man's beautiful singing voice.  After the pastor gave the benediction my father once again turned to the man and invited him to come sing in the choir on Thursday night.

A month later the the church announced it had hired a new choir director and guess who it was? That's right, the man my father had invited to choir that Sunday morning. When the new choir director introduced himself to the congregation for the first time he noted that he chose our church because during his visit the church had been both friendly and inviting.

Commenting about his voice was my father's way of being friendly.  Inviting him to visit the choir was an invitation from my father to begin a relationship. Most churches are friendly but what distinguishes one friendly church from another are those churches where members are intentional about going beyond friendliness to building relationships and welcoming visitors into their circle of friends and into the life of the church and ultimately into a relationship with God.

What prevents us from moving beyond friendliness? And how can we be more intentional about building relationships with those who visit our churches?