Looks like God doesn't want me to get off of this. You say you're a Christan. You say you love Him, but you refuse to let go of your safety harness and trust him completely? You think you can handle things without God? God is the reason why you aren't going to hell. God is the reason you exist. He isthe Prince not just in heaven, but on Earth. Is it not true that all unhappy families don't have God completely? Let go of trying to make peace and let Him.