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| My Personal Multiple Sclerosis Story |
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It felt like a bee sting. I was walking to my car after work in May 1993 (at the age of 31), and I felt a bee sting on the bottom of my right foot. I grabbed my shoe and shook it to release the bee, but there was no bee. During the following days and weeks, a numblike feeling moved from my foot to all the right side of my body. My doctor and the neurologist he sent me to, said it was stress. After about a month I recovered completely except for the numbness in my right fingers that I have since just learned to live with.
September 6, 1997 I was sitting on the front row of a youth ministry session at Ridgecrest Conference Center, and I was overtaken by a frightening sensation in my brain, like nothing I had ever felt before. A lightheadedness, a nausea, but something much bigger and indescribable. I asked for help to leave and passed out when I stood, waking later to the same neurological feeling. After a series of tests over the next several weeks, I was told everything checked out fine. I knew that not to be true, as I was unable to sit upright or stand in one position for more than a few seconds, without passing out. Fortunately I soon learned that I could control it by leaning my head on something. This has greatly improved over the past ten years, but it has not disappeared.
November 2004 I had another attack of numbness, beginning in my feet and moving up my body. I fully recovered after about a month. This time, however, my tests showed problems. My MRI was “significantly abnormal”, with 3-4 periventricular lesions. My lumbar puncture (spinal tap) showed a mild elevation of white blood cells to 6 with a differential of predominantly lymphocytes, positive oligoclonal bands and an elevated IgG index of 1.6. (lol – I have no idea what I just said!)
February 25, 2005 I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. A second opinion agreed with 95% certainty but believed my case was a “benign” one, meaning it seems to be progressing at a very slow rate, which may not ever reach the stage of disability.
Since that time, I had one more numbness attack, in December 2005, again starting in my right foot and moving up, I have had an MRI each year, and I have refused my neurologist’s pleas to begin treatment. Instead I have put myself on serious vitamin therapy and have made exercise a high priority in my life.
So far I am one of the fortunate ones. About one in ten MS sufferers seems to have a very slow-moving case of the disease, while many others quickly progress from ability to disability, often having to leave work and move around by wheelchair. Of course there is no guarantee that any case will remain benign. Every hour of every day, someone is diagnosed with MS. MS is a progressive disease of the nervous system, causing symptoms that may include numbness, fatigue, dizziness, incontinence, slurred speech, or problems with balance, vision, or cognition.
Yesterday I got the results from my latest MRI, opening it quickly in hopes of finding the same “stable, no new problems” message I had last year. But yesterday’s news was not so good. “A new lesion is present,” my neurologist wrote, “I am worried and would like to start treatment.” No, no treatment yet. I can be so stubborn, hopefully not stupidly so.
Why do I continue to refuse treatment? There is no known cause or cure for MS, and the treatments, although believed to slow the progression in most people, do not heal any damage that has already been done. No one (doctors, researchers, etc.) understands why the treatments help, and there are serious, even dangerous, side effects. Even the treatments themselves are life-changing. Daily to weekly self-injections, that seem to lead almost immediately to walking with a cane. Should that time come for me, may I accept it with grace (like I see exhibited and admire in many of our MyChurch friends), but I am not there yet. My work has been unaffected, and, not only am I walking without help, I am running 5K races occasionally!
I have become an advocate for those less fortunate, those whose news is more serious and whose lives are completely disrupted by the disease. Those who daily await a cure, which fortunately is being aggressively sought. Should God lay it upon your heart, please join me in praying for them, and in praying that I will know when my stubbornness is crossing the stupidity line!
46:1-2 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth should change, though the mountains shake in the heart of the sea.
56:3-4 When I am afraid, I put my trust in thee. In God whose word I praise, in God I trust without a fear. What can flesh do to me?
You can learn more about MS at nationalmssociety.org.
Others with MS or similar diseases to pray for (taken from the comments here):
Deb's sister-in-law (MS)
Cheryl (lupus)
Carebear's aunt (MS)
Donna (fibromyalgia with lupuslike symptoms)
Donna's friend (MS)
BlewJ's aunt Susie (MS)
Lara's friend Mike (shakes, slurred speech)
HanaRose's friend's mom (MS)
Gloryw's daughter-in-law (MS)
Kipper's sister Debra (lupus and fibromyalgia)
Becky's many friends (MS)
Golden2100 (cancer)
Bren's son-in-law Victor (vision and muscle problems - possible MS)
Restore's friend Carole (MS)
Cindy's husband (MS)
Restore's friend Deborah S. (MS)
If you know of others, share them and we will pray. |
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You and all who are in need will be in my prayers Kathy. God bless |
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| Kathy, I will be adding this to my prayers for you............. |
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Kathy, I do not even know what to say!
I pray that The Lord, Himself, would heal you.
I pray His peace and comfort would abide with you every second of every night and every day!!
Forgiven. |
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Jerry |
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February 09, 2008 at 9:21am |
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Kathy,
Women can be stubborn sometimes! lol!!! But all kidding aside, he is able and we are praying for you. Keep testifying. Your words are so valuable to others that are going through. |
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| And an excellent advocate you are, dear Kathy! Thanks for raising awareness. ~mike |
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Kathy, you are a beacon of light that continues to point to Him. Stay strong lady. Your fight is a hard one, but so far you are doing well. Many of us will stand by you as you continue. Keep your eyes focused on the prize. I know you know what it is - that statement when we pass over "well done good and faithful one".
IMHO, in this case, you know know your body better than anybody else. You will know when it is time to begin treatments. |
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| Wow, Kathy. I had no idea. You are added to my prayer calendar on Mondays! |
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Hey Kathy, my thoughts and prayer are with you. I suffer from chronic Fibromyalgia . There are days I cry in pain.. but one day this too shall pass , this is my faith !! Heb:11.1 "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. " |
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| Kathy, my heart goes out to you. Michelle and I will definitely be keeping you in our prayers. Keep us posted concerning how things are going. |
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Sue |
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February 09, 2008 at 10:29am |
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| Thank you for sharing your story Kathy. I will be praying... We love you!! |
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Kathy |
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February 09, 2008 at 10:31am |
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| Patrick, Paul, Cathy, Jerry, Voice, Soozanne, Peter, and Pastor Tim, thank you so much for your prayers! Jerry, you seem to speak from experience! :) Mike, thanks for the encouragement. |
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Kathy |
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February 09, 2008 at 10:32am |
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| Thank you, Sue!!! |
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Kathy, as soon as i finished your blog I closed my eyes in prayer for you and will continue to keep you in my prayers.
I know God will look after you and will continue to keep you strong so that you will continue to keep us thinking with the wonderful blogs you write.
God Bless,
Bob
P.S. I don't for a second think God gives us pain or disease, but He gives us strength and motivation through it. |
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Thanks for the post;
Forgive my ignorance as I don't know what half of it meant. But I've also noticed in my process of recovering from the Stroke I don't very often know what my doctors are saying. I really wonder if they know what they are saying???
I'll continue to pray for ya.
Blessings, David |
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Darlene |
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February 09, 2008 at 1:44pm |
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Kathy, God is bigger than any of our sorrows and I know He holds you in the palm of His hand. He will guide you in all of your ways, especially in this. Darlene |
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Deb |
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February 09, 2008 at 2:15pm |
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| I have a sister-in-law that has MS and I have seen the struggles she has gone through through the years. Her doctors have tried her on several different treatment plans, so work for a while but then their effectiveness diminishes. She is still able to walk without a cane, but she is unsteady on her feet. I feel it is only a matter of time until she has to take that step and eventually a wheelchair. This is a horrible disease. I will pray for you Kathy. |
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Hey Kathy,
Trust your feelings, I've learned to trust those who are in the process more than those outside the process. I also believe that God has given you much wisdom and discernment, trust His voice on when to start their treatments. I also will continue to keep you in my prayers. |
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Dear sister, My Prayers are surely with you. I love you Kathy and treasure you as my sister in the Lord. Be encouraged and know that you are truely covered. Your Brother in Christ, Honoray |
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Fienie |
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February 10, 2008 at 11:17am |
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| Ah Kathy thanks for sharing, just stay strong in Faith! Stay sensitive for His voice.Will definitely put you on my prayer list. Take care!!! Remember that Jehovah Rapha can heal anytime!! |
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Kathy |
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February 10, 2008 at 5:24pm |
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Bob, thank you for your prayers and your very kind words!
Dave, I can relate! :) Thanks for the prayers!
Amen, Darlene! Thank you!
Deb, a prayer for your sister-in-law. And thank you for your prayers!
Dennis, thank you for your confirming words and for your prayers!
Thank you, Honoray, for your prayers and your friendship!
Thank you, Fienie, for your prayers! I am blessed! |
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Cheryl |
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February 10, 2008 at 7:00pm |
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Kathy,
I love you. I too understand, I have Lupus, a cousin to MS. I was told at the age of 18 that I would be in a wheelchair by the age of 25. At the age of 25 I had a stroke, but fully recovered within 6 months! I am in my mid-thirties and I am doing great. I walk 3 miles several times a week and am on vitamins and diet therapy. God is good and has always taken care of me. He will take care of you. You know, you will know when it is time...if ever to begin treatments. I will be praying too! Love~ |
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Gene |
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February 10, 2008 at 7:41pm |
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Kathy,
Our bodies are the temple of God, and as such I believe we should treat it with dignity and respect in all stages of life. So when we encounter some medical treatment that have reason to believe is helpful, it is right to get the treatment. Why would we be willing to let what is set apart for God to fall into disrepair?
How many times did Christ say, "Do not be afraid." ?
BTW, have you looked in any alternative treatments? The American medical establish is the world's best at diagnosis, but sometimes ignores treatments from alternative sources.
Gene |
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Kathy, my aunt is suffering from MS as well. She will be retiring from teaching modern dance in 2 weeks when she bows at her last recital on the 23rd month. She too is stubborn when it comes to her physical state just like we all are and will be. I will pray for your wisdom on when to begin treatment. But even with treatment, your beautiful life will not stop. In fact I believe God will soon gift you the ability to reach others who are in the same situation.. except with the ever more important task of sharing His love. Please continue to sharing all your requests.. I'm all ears :). |
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Donna S |
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February 11, 2008 at 7:11am |
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Kathy I am lifting you and all who suffer from MS in Prayer, as I have already been doing. My friend has it and is where you are at, she refuses treatment, but is unable to cary out her job. She is managing and still can walk and drive a car. I Praise her and all who fight!! I have fibromyalgia w/lupus symptoms and is on 2 kinds of meds, one which is a non narcodic pain med. I have been to so many drs since I was in my 20's and today I have God, Prasie him!!! for giving me the strength to fight and not give in to my daily pain and other issues that have come up as of lately. I will keep you close in prayer sweetie.
Follow your heart on this and dont think of it as being stupid, give it to Him who has the answers and will appear when you need it.
Love & Blessings
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Good testimony, Kathy. I will be praying more for you from now on.
Please pray that I will do some exercising. I put everything ahead of using my stationary bike. |
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Lord,I ask that you be with Kathy as whe is going through MS.God I ask that you give her discernment,give her wisdom,courage& strength through her descions & trials.I thank you that this is a slower moving process in her body & we thank you for the things that you are going to in her life. Lord,I thank you that she is willing to be an advocte of those with disabilities.Amen |
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Denise |
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February 11, 2008 at 9:15am |
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| Thank you Kathy for sharing your testimonty with us. Thank you too for being the caring person that you are. Hugs to you Kathy
God bless you is my prayer |
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Kathy |
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February 11, 2008 at 5:27pm |
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Cheryl, yes, lupus and MS seem to have many similarities. When they test for one, they often test for both. Love to you, Cheryl. God is omnipotent, and His love is beyond our imaginings!
Gene, I totally agree with your perspective. I believe that God works through doctors and through the medical field. I also believe that well-meaning and caring doctors sometimes make a wrong call, and that it is ultimately our body and our decision of what chances to take with it. If it's a wrong call, the dr. will have other patients, but I won't get another earthly body. MS treatments are a very complex issue. As for alternative treatments, there are many, but they are for treating symptoms, not the disease itself. And I don't have the usual MS symptoms. I should also complicate the matter by saying that there is not absolute diagnosis for MS, and although I agree something is causing lesions on my brain, I am not fully convinced that my diagnosis is the right one. All very complex, Gene! Thank you for your thoughts for me! You are a good friend!
Carol, thank you. We will pray for your aunt. Oh, it must be even tougher for a dancer. How old is she? I'm sure you are right that should this disease become a promient part of my life, God will use it for His kingdom. Currently I have not adopted it , and it has not adopted me. I generally think about it this time of year when I have my MRI, and go on about my life the rest of the time, hopefully in the work of His kingdom. The great thing is that wherever we are in life, God wants to use us in ways way only we are the perfect fit! |
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Kathy |
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February 11, 2008 at 5:34pm |
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Thank you, Donna, for your prayers and encouragment. I have started a prayer list at the end of this blog and will add you and your friend to it, so we can all pray together.Did you used be a Southern waitress in your other life? They like to call everybody sweetie and honey! It goes with the Southern hospitality and Southern cooking! :) Hug to you!
Bill, thanks for the prayers. Now go get on that bicycle. It's stationary, so it's a perfect place to pray! :)
Racunpoodle, thank you for such a wonderful prayer! You are a blessing!
Denise, big hug right back! Thank you for your friendship! |
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Gene |
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February 11, 2008 at 6:48pm |
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| OK, well, I am praying for you. |
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| Kathy, you have such a great attitude! |
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BlewJ |
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February 11, 2008 at 9:07pm |
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| I know you've seen my posts, that I'm doing the MS Walk, that I do it annually, that I'm struggling to fund raise, but anyway thanks for sharing your story about your life HAVING MS. For me, it's watching someone else, my aunt Susie, have it, and that's terrible but it's still a step removed from the strength you must exhibit in actually having it. Nothing leads us to putting faith in the God who is whole but was broken for us than when we ourselves are broken and feel like we're not whole. Let me just tell you that you are whole and well and one day you're pain and degeneration will be no more. You're doing well with the journey you've been given. God bless you. |
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Glenn |
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February 12, 2008 at 8:23am |
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Hey Kathy, thank you for sharing this with us. Sometimes we tend to hold onto our troubles and try to carry the load alone when there are many who would gladly share that load with us. You are in my prayers! God please fill Kathy with your grace in her daily life, and bring her peace as she shines your love to those around her!
peace Kathy. |
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I Will say of the Lord,He is my refuge and my fortress,my God in Him will I trust,psalm91;2
When you pass through the waters,i will be with you,when you pass through the rivers they
will not sweep over you,when you walk through the fire ,you will not be burned.the flames will
not set you ablaze,for Iam the Holy ,one of Israel,your saviour .Isa;2-3.
We do not prove the resources of God,until we learn to trust Him for the impossible.and when He is going to do something wonderful,He always begin with difficulty.hold on kathy,
and we will continue to pray together.
God bless |
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Kathy, you have a wealth of unbelievable qualities. From strength and wisdom, understanding and caring, sharing, meekness... the list can go on and on. I think everyone could gain from your friendship, I certianly have. What does that have to do with MS? Nothing. I just wanted to let you know how special you are and how God is using you.
I'll certianly be in prayer for you. |
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LorenDP |
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February 12, 2008 at 8:40am |
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| amen to Rich. |
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Cheryl |
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February 12, 2008 at 12:18pm |
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| Had to check back...what love!!!! |
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Kathy |
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February 12, 2008 at 5:28pm |
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Thank you, Gene! (I told you I was stubborn!) :)
Cheryl and Voice, you are such great support! Thank you!
BlewJ, thank you so much for walking in the MS Walk! I too will soon be preparing to walk. Ours is Apr. 12. I went to your NMSS page and saw you have a $2000 goal! That's fantastic! If anyone wants to help BlewJ with a great cause (I may be slightly biased!), it's safe to donate straight to the National MS Society and watch BlewJ's total climb on-line: BlewJ's MS Page Or you want to walk and raise funds yourself for MS research and programs, you can find your own local walk at the NMSS link at the end of this blog. (Scroll back up.) |
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Kathy |
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February 12, 2008 at 5:39pm |
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Glenn, you are such a blessing! Thank you for your care, your prayers, and your special friendship! Your sincere words brought peace to my heart.
Thank you, Blessings! The Lord, is indeed my fortress and my refuge! What a great passage!
Rich, you are the sweetest, most encouraging, and most entertaining redneck I've ever loved! :) I'm blessed to be your friend! And one of these days when I'm passing through the Raleigh area, I'm going to seek out your trailer park and chat a while with you and Juan! Maybe we can all go to Taco Bell or something!
Loren, your kindness is so appreciated! Thank you! |
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Amy |
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February 13, 2008 at 2:23am |
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| Dear Kathy, i am going to pray for you today and others with MS. I for one, did not realize just how much this disease can affect someones life. I admire your faith and determination to fight back at this disease. Sometimes we forget (at least i do anyway), that Jesus not only took our sins to the cross, but our infirmities as well! Have a blessed day, in Jesus' name. Your sister in Christ, Amy |
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Kathy |
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February 13, 2008 at 9:20am |
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| Thank you, Amy, for your words and your prayers! The Notebook is one of my favorite novels of all time, and I haven't seen the documentary you listed in your favorite movies, but have you also seen End of the Spear about the same missionaries? They are such an inspiration. |
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Joey |
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February 13, 2008 at 1:34pm |
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Kathy, you are just one of those people I've fallen in love with. Thank you for sharing this with us, because as your friends, we need to know. We need to know so that we can pray for you and encourage you. Dear heart, you're such a strong woman, and I know you have a heart that hears God and serves Him.
You will be in our prayers daily. Please, listen to your heart as God speaks to you, or through other people such as your doctors. As Voice said, you will know when it is time for medications. And you will know too.... you are and never will be alone. God bless you, Kathy.
Joey |
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My friend, Mike (there's actually a picture of him at a church picnic on my church page photos). He still sings like nothing else, but he shakes and he has fallen off his chair in church, and he has slurred speech. what an awesome trooper he is! He has the driest corniest sence of humor and cracks me up! But yeah, pray for him too. Thanks for sharing this with us. I had no idea, so I will have to keep you in my prayers. I have been learning about some natural oils, and the guy who began this company is actually born again. There seems to be a cure for everything with all that stuff, and oil penetrates straight through the blood barrier whereas other things do not. Look how smart I sound! Check it out! lol Actually, I don't know what that means exactly, but it said it on the info CD. The company is called "Young Living." They use a lot of Biblical oils. Just keep believing God for healing, and also, likely, you won't have a chance to be in a wheelchair; Jesus will likely be back by then, and you will be dancing on streets of pure gold! |
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Gene |
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February 14, 2008 at 4:28pm |
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Kathy, my heart goes out for you. There seem to be so many debilitating diseases out there. I'm not sure how anyone can live to be 100 without being impacted adversely by something seriously bad. Yet, your life and life lessons seem to be so real that they are an inspiration to many, many people. I pray that God lofts you up and uses you in more ways than you can imagine - for healing, for peace, and for God's reconciliation with the lost.
Peace, sister.
the other Gene |
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| Each year I do a walk for MS and will do the walk in your name, sweetie. |
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| My friend's mom was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis about half a year ago, however, no major symptoms have showed up yet! We've been praying for her for months, and she's doing quite well! I'll keep you in my prayers, also! |
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Gloryw |
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February 17, 2008 at 6:24pm |
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| My daughter-in-law was given the same diagnosis about 9 years ago. We are praying and believing for complete healing. We will add your name to our prayer. Standing on His covenant word "by His strips you are healed". |
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Kathy |
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February 17, 2008 at 8:03pm |
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Joey, thank you for your precious words! The love is mutual! :)
Thank you, Lara! I am praying for Mike and have added him to the blog prayer list.
Thank you, Gene. Your sincere words bring healing and peace!
Megan, thank you so much for walking for MS!
HanaRose, thank you for your prayers. I am praying for your friend's mom and have added her to the prayer list here.
Gloryw, welcome to MyChurch! I am praying for your daughter-in-law and have added her to the prayer list on this blog. |
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Kathy |
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February 17, 2008 at 8:56pm |
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| I am participating in my 4th MS Walk on April 12, to raise funds for MS research and programs. If anyone would like to make a donation, let me know, and I'll send you a link. More importantly, if God so leads, please pray that a cure will soon be found! |
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Kathy,
I so sorry that I'm just getting to read your blog, however, know that (and I know you do know it) God is in the miracle making business. I know you Kathy as a women of conviction, and I believe you are a woman of faith. I will stand with you in your faith walk.... and believe that the Lord will see you through it.
Pastor Aminata |
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Kipper |
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February 20, 2008 at 5:50pm |
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| Let me encourage you! God HEALED me of fibromyalgia almost 4 years ago and HE can heal you too!!! I will keep all of your in prayer requests in prayer too! (can you add my sister to your list, Debra...she has lupus & fibromyalgia) Thanks! Blessings! Kipper |
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Kathy, I am so sorry being so late in responding. I didn't know you had to do subscriptions until recently( just thought people weren't blogging lol).
My prayers are with you and all that you mentioned. I know in reading your blogs you are a tough lady and strong in your faith. God Bless. |
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Kathy,
You are so brave and courageous to have taken the route you have, chosing excercise and vitamin therapy. Bless you! I have many friends in KC that have the disease, and it is heartbreaking how it affects them. I did the MS 50 mile walk and the MS 150 ride in KC a few years ago and the most amazing thing about it was people like you who had the disease and participated. I am praying for you.
Bless you |
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Kathy |
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February 22, 2008 at 7:52am |
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Pastor Aminata and Cheryl, it is never too late to respond to a blog! I especially appreciate the comments that come months later (and yours is nowhere near that)! Cheryl, I think subscriptions are more important now than they used to be, with recent changes to the site. Without the subscription, we have to catch the blog at just the right time, to see it. So much easier to just click on "subscriptions" and see what's been posted recently, unless you have time to keep a constant watch on the active blogs list! Thank you both for your kind words and your prayers. Pastor Aminata, I am indeed a woman a faith, although my faith is more a trust than a belief that I'll be healed. I am trusting God that either He will heal me, or that He has a greater plan, that although I would never choose, I will carry out with as much grace as I can, to build His kingdom, which is not dependent on perfect earthly health. (But healing would be great!) :) Cheryl, sometimes I don't feel so tough! :)
Kipper, PTL! I am so glad God chose to heal you! And I am praying for Debra and have added her to the prayer list above.
Becky, I am so impressed! The 50 mile walk and the 150 mile bike ride!!! I considered the bike ride a few years back, but didn't end up doing it, mainly for needing to get so much work done that weekend, and of course, I wasn't sure I could do it! But you did!!! The walk I do is about a 5K, which I'm actually planning to run this year, to get in my run at the same time. Thank you so much for your help and care for those with MS. I believe a cause and cure will be found soon, as the research is very active. I added your friends to the prayer list. |
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Ain't it strange how doctors can only find "treatments" for so many diseases and no cures. As many know. I have cancer and it seams that even though they "claim" to be looking for a "cure" there is no less today than in 1950. In fact there is more thanks to the drug companies and their new 'non-cancer' giving drugs that do just the opposite.
I have used many products to keep my doctors from ending my life early after learning what they are not aware of themselves. Kevin Truudeau wrote a book called "Natural Cures "they" don't want you to know about" some time ago and it has sold over 10,000.000 copies to date. There are 280 m | |
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