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| How About We Just Love the Sinner? |
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Many of the folks around us everyday go cold when they hear Christians say, "Love the sinner; hate the sin." I don't know if this is a new phenomenon but our culture is training many, many people to think of their sins, not as something they do, but as who they are. In other words, it’s not a matter of activity; it’s a matter of identity. <br> Think about it… You probably know people who respond to any moral second-guessing with a casual, “That’s just the way I am.” Do you think that they believe that you can love them but hate the way they are? <br> Strongholds, addictions, generational patterns, “lifestyles”… Try explaining “love the sinner; hate the sin” to a sexworker or homosexual. Try sharing God’s hope to the person going into rehab—again—when they know their next stop is in a place where every conversation begins “…and I’m an alcoholic.” The line between sin and sinner isn’t nearly as stark as we assume it to be. When we use throw-away, “you know what I mean” lines like this, we reinforce our Enemy’s every lie (that I’m beyond God’s interest) and accusation (that I’ve gone too far, anyway), we join in his contemptuous invitation to abandon all hope. We cut ourselves off from desperately hurting people, people created in God’s image whom we’ve been sent to reach. <br> My point here isn’t theological so much as it’s practical. Take a look at 2 Corinthians 5:11-21 and consider the implications. We’re ambassadors, commissioned by The King to impart His message to a people foreign to Him. I don’t have the luxury of speaking carelessly. My words must be chosen prudently and seasoned with God’s grace and wisdom so that I consistently communicate God’s call to reconciliation. The offense of the Cross is enough. I don’t need to add my preferences and my little twists on His message. Folks living in the darkness of Satan’s lies are counting on us to get this right. (Romans 10:5-15) <br> This message of reconciliation has been committed to me and I must faithfully communicate it. Don’t worry about watering things down, Truth and holiness will be better modeled in our lives lived out than in our smug mouths being talked out. (And anyway, what good does it do for us to convert folk’s behavior if God hasn’t converted their souls?) The Holy Spirit will still work to convict of sin and God will still judge. You have to admit it works much better when we let them handle those things. <br> But until then, what do you say we just love the sinner and let it go at that? |
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| Beautifully said Pastor Dan. Let the only stumbling block be Jesus Christ Himself. Get out of the way. |
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| I think the answer to your question is that it is so much easier to "hate the sin" than to "love the sinner". Good reminder for all of us to love 'em as He does...for He loved us that way, too. |
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Kathy |
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March 07, 2007 at 4:39am |
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| Pastor Dan, You are standing on my soapbox! :) Jesus' message and example to us is to love, not to condemn. As my pastor has wisely pointed out, the only people we see Jesus condemning are the religious self-righteous. Thanks for a great blog! |
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Pastor Dan,
We are currently studying a book in community group that devotes an entire chapter to the fact that we are God's ambassadors. The author states that we must not only know the will of the King but also how the King wishes us to carry out his will. I believe when we love the sinners it is much more pleasing to God than when we judge them. I agree with you, let us do our job and let the Lord do his.(He is better at it any ways.) Thank you for putting so much thought into what you write. You are a true blessing my brother.
Your brother in Christ,
Tom |
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| I guess I'm just dense. I understand the "loving the sinner" part, but why the period after sinner? What about Jude v.23? |
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Tory |
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March 07, 2007 at 2:30pm |
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| this brought tears to my eyes. thank you, thank you, thank you! |
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Charlie, I know about Jude 23 but I’m not writing about how we should feel about sin. Sin is undoubtedly ugly. The brokenness and destruction it brings in this life are tragic enough and the implications for the world to come… I’m engaged in frontline ministry and see its effects everyday.
As I said my point isn't about theology, it's about communication. An ambassador relies on clarity so the language used is carefully measured and “how will my hearers perceive this?” is a primary concern. I first heard this point about “love the sinner; hate the sin” explicitly explained at a "Love Won Out" conference last year.
Our culture has conflated behavior and identity to the point that the concepts of sinner and sin have become inseparable. Our culture does not differentiate between the two. (Consider “I’m gay” as compared to “I have sex with people of the same gender.”) To many of our contemporaries "love the sinner; hate the sin" makes just as much sense as "I love Charlie; I hate Charlie."
As a pastor, I’ve encountered this barrier in dealing with homosexuals, sexworkers, addicts/alcoholics, divorced people, single parents, post-abortion folks… You get the idea. Some of these involve blatantly sinful acts and some of them are much more subtle but the fact has been that each of those folks I’m thinking of feels that an identity has been imposed on them. As with Hawthorne’s scarlet “A”, they feel that either Life or the Church (or both) has slapped an irremovable label on them. And, if you’ll permit me to translate, I rarely hear that label expressed as “I am a sinner” but rather “I am << my particular sin >>.” When they hear us recite our little formula about sinners and sin, they don’t hear that they are loved. They hear that they are vile and repulsive, an abhorrent object of scorn and derision. I’m supposedly an ambassador bearing God’s call to reconciliation and instead they hear rejection that puts them beyond God’s care or grace. That’s no way to “implore [them] on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God.”
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R |
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March 07, 2007 at 7:06pm |
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Hi Dan,
Dan, I think I understand your concern and surely God has placed you and used you. But it is a bit of a fine line with me, if I am understanding you right.
Some love is as fake as the day is long, and I can be an excellent actor and do everything from the flesh. One person kinda said, we don't want to condemn the sinner, and I would agree, but we do have the wisdom to judge them. ...and to judge them, is not being unloving, it is the best thing we can do for them.
No one is going to pick up their Cross (as Jesus said), and head toward Golgotha, unless we help them see that they deserve judgment (death). They must see His righteousness, as well as His love.
...and so, God has provided the way by co-crucifying us toghter with Christ. and the question is, will they receive such a reconciliation?
Yes, we help them along (with love in mind, of course); but we don't hold back the grave situation that they are in. We want them to take their Cross... and run (run up that Hill), because they do deserve to die so that they can be (supernaturally) reborn, right now (Col.3:1-3 & 2 Cor.5:17).
That's what happened to me, when I thought about it...
Robert |
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I don't think that is was Dan is saying Rob...cause I believe we all agree. (Correct me if I am wrong Dan) I think the point is here that if we are disgusted with the action one is involved in we are much less likely to love the person we are trying to reach. Of course sin must be confronted but that will never happen if the relationship b/w the "minister" and the "ministry" never form.
You may not agree, but when a person is being confronted by a Christian about salvation, the whole time that person is checking out the "preacher' and looking for any form of judgement...
People attend classes regularly to learn how to lead others to the Lord...and make it seem so hard. Within the confessing body open sin has no place and all sin must be confronted. But to make a sinner feel dirty by expressing your views of their sin (through word or expression) will kill any chance for you to allow the Holy Spirit to convict them through you...b/c that is how it is done.
If a lost person is, say gay, his being gay is not sending him to hell...his not receiving Jesus is. And that same Jesus who has cleaned us all can clean that man and set him free. That is where we will come in...
We witness Christ to them by 1st lovingthem, the Holy Spirit convicts them, we lead them, Christ cleans them. We disciple them. They witness to others...The process works well.
Robert I thouroughly agree that until they understand why they need Jesus they won't. But the why is not the action but the state they are in. The Bible is very clear on sexuality, relationships, social behavior, etc and if we are faithful in the discipling then all of that will be addressed behind closed doors where it needs to be.
Good blog Dan...love the sinner kick the devil in the teeth |
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Let me restate that last paragraph
Robert I thouroughly agree that until they understand why they need Jesus they won't truly receive His salvation. But the "why" is not the action but the state they are in. The "why" I am speaking of is why they need Jesus. The Bible is very clear on sexuality, relationships, social behavior, etc and if we are faithful in the discipling then all of that will be addressed behind closed doors where it needs to be.
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I think there's some kind of subconscious reflex to try to separate things out, such as "put the person over here...and the sin over there." In reality, unregenerate folk have only one nature: a sinful one. But it's not their sin that's the big problem. Jesus took care of that on the cross. They will be released from it as soon as they believe in Him, if they decide to. The problem is they are spiritually DEAD...completely helpless...eternally estranged from their loving Creator. Unless and until they turn around.
That's the thing that ought to keep us up at night, and wake us early in the morning. To pray for such souls that we know. Because it's heartbreaking. So instead of the usual cliche, I say "Let your heart break for the sinner; Jesus has already taken care of the sin."
~Lynn, a.k.a. cascadeofwater |
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YES!
Btw,where were you when I was wrestling to write that first post? Your final sentence captures what I was trying to bring to the fore. |
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I love to see the "body of Christ" in action. We truly need EVERY member as each functions in union with the Head. What a glorious thing that is!
I think I understand now. Jesus was able to separate in His mind the sin from the sinner cuz He knew why He came, and the Father's plan was ever before Him in all He did.
We will avoid, or be ineffective in reaching out to others until we can separate the "sin" from who they are as a person. The separating must FIRST be settled within us, if we are to be used to reach out to others. Our focus and heart MUST be directed toward that person on an equal plane with us and all humanity. We reach out to the person, and let the Spirit do the convicting.
Is that close? |
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R |
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March 08, 2007 at 4:35am |
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How About We Just Love the Sinner? YES...
Hey, since I'm heading in this direction anyway, here's my next inclusion on my train of thought (derailed or not). But!, my intent is not to incite anger, I 'm sharing what I think. It is not meant to point the finger at any specific individual, it is just sitting out on the front porch, and inserting my thoughts, into what you are talking about. Afterwards, let's all go out for ice cream and I'll buy. Ok? Ok...
So here is what comes to mind next (fasten seat belts):
Is this another to do list? If it is... I think we would do better to ask, "where is the power going to come from, to do this?" Better yet, why am I asking the question, if I walk in the Spirit? Walking in the Spirit, would self correct itself.
But many don't believe, nor is it emphasized from leaders enough (in my opinion), that we can expect to get our orders directly from the Spirit, about any given situation (John 3:8 "the wind blows where it wishes, and you hear the sound of it, but cannot tell where it comes from and where it goes. So is everyone who is born of the Spirit)."
I have friends that cuss like saliors, and when they do (since I believe, words have meanings), sometimes I point out their language is terrible, and other times I don't. Again, there isn't any pre-set system when it comes to walking in the Spirit. You do what He suggests, when He suggests it.
Another comes to mind... one of these individuals walks into my office, just after I had a great time with the Lord and Spirit; and instead of considering who I was talking to, I just let him have it. I told him about the power of God in true Christianity. This is why so many people (like yourself Jody), turn up their noses at Christians because you want to see some evidence of power. And the problem is Jody, many believers don't believe. They believe for the wrong things and from the wrong source. But there is power Jody. Then I told him that I was giving the message (at our home Church), the next day, and proceeded to lay it all out before him.
Now, speed up the tape, to about a month or so later, and here, I say nothing about it; but the fact is Jody still comes around, he may be looking for something; and time will tell.
But... just because this happened one time, is no cause to turn around and write a book about it saying, "this shall be the way it is, concerning this situation, for; forevermore." Some actually do this, and again the Spirit takes a back seat, while we hash it out saying, "we must designate more offices for this type of situation to occur. We will establish large signs saying free coffee and dounuts inside, and pipe in some somber music... etc."
...and the whole thing begins to look like a funeral home. Maybe the emphasis over the whole article needed to be, "Walk in the Spirit, get your marching orders directly from Him, and expect the unexpected."
Of course, this will be followed by a walking on water class, in Room 101. Thanks...
Now that I've said this, lets go get a Rocky Road, eh? Just my thoughts, just my thoughts... |
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I agree Robert, there is no "formula" walking in the Spirit. The Wind blows as He wills.
The first time I heard this statement below..I disagreed strongly. Now I embrace it and pray it will always be my life theme.
There is no security in what God is doing. Our security is in who God is.
God may never do the same thing twice, or He may do it everytime but one. But who God is will never change. God is love. God is merciful. God is righteous. God is holy. God is sovereign. God is..."I AM."
The Bible is filled with examples of "I AM," and how He interacts with people. His desire is for us to live in relationship with Him and get to know Him and His nature (who He is) and then live our day to day lives in such a way that His nature shines out of us to others. How we treat people reflects how intimately we know "I AM." |
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March 08, 2007 at 5:07am |
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Hi Charlie,
Thanks, and I agree.
Have a blessed day, I'm off to work.
Robert... |
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I think I said somewhere else that if you choose to enter into a blog then get upset that someone disagrees with you...they are not the problem...
Rob, I thoroughly agree with your last statement. There is of course a balance needed and accountability in all things but when it comes to individual walk and ministry, why do poeple constantly look for other people to guide them rather than from God? (Redundant statement...know the answer) Especially in personal ministry (witnessing)...I have taught on this numerous times...
The Holy Spirit will guide our lips in all things if we are letting Him lead us...if we are seeking His guidance...
To expound on your profanity statement...I would go further to say that unless we have developed a personal relationship with someone...if we feel the "need" to call them down for an action it is more likely our own "righteous indignation" rather than the Holy Spirit....like so many say. The leading of the Holy Spirit has been the excuse for manyu a believer to do what they want to do and has been the weapon used to kill many hearts...
People ask me how I witness so successfully (not boasting) and my answer is simple...I keep the witnessing to people who need it (I am amazed that Christians mostly witness to other Christians but have nothing for the ost) and I try with all my heart not to speak a word of my own and let the Holy Spirit lead me...as a rule of thumb I do not criticize any one for their sin...and I don't let my eyes leave their eyes for any reason...unless they ask me to look at something...any conviction they feel I want to be of the Holy Spirit and I focus on their need of Christ plain and simple.
People go to hell b/c they have not received Christ...that is it |
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| And my point with that 1st statement was...speak your mind...I love when people do...with tact of course |
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Only thing I'd add is to avoid the temptation to overlook that God does sometimes use other people to lead us--even through their writings, for instance!
(And Robert, "cuss like a sailor?" It's like those Geico caveman commercials to this old squid. ;-] )
God bless y'all,
+Pastor Dan, USN, (ret'd) |
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Cathy |
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March 08, 2007 at 7:19am |
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| Dan.....You Da Man!!!!! |
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| Yes...again the word is balance. No one is called that is not sent. Again...it is much easier to see a correct decision when it is on the hearts of many, not just one. |
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R |
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March 08, 2007 at 4:01pm |
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Opps, Sorry Pastor Dan, ol' shipmate Sir, didn't mean to launch a torpedo at you. Hope no one was seriously injured. As a side note; Jody was a sailor also. Maybe when he is born again, he'll become a minister, and he too, can help others steer their boats around the blogs, and encourage them, to depend on the Captian of their salvation (Hebrews 2:10). Until then, in the words of Mark Farner (that saved Grand Funk guy), "I'm getting closer to my home..." and all I can say is "Thanks Captian... Thanks Captian, what a great salvation you have provided us. Robert... P.S. Webyouthpa, yes we have talked about it before. |
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I was just looking through C.S. Lewis' Mere Christianity and ran across this in the chapter on forgiveness: "Now that I come to think of it, I remember Christian teachers telling me long ago that I must hate a bad man's actions, but not hat the bad man; or, as they would say, hate the sin but not the sinner. "For a long time I used to think this a silly, straw-splitting distinction: how could you hate what a man did and not hate the man? But years later it occurred to me that there was one man to whom I had been doing this all my life--namely myself. However much I might dislike my own cowardice or conceit or greed, I went on loving myself. There had never been the slightest difficulty about it. In fact the very reason why I hated the things was that I loved the man. Just because I loved myself, I was sorry to find that I was the sort of man who did those things. Consequently, Christianity does not want us to reduce by one atom the hatred we feel for cruelty and treachery. We ought to hate them. Not one word of what we have said about them needs to be unsaid. But it does want us to hate them in the same way in which we hate things in ourselves: being sorry that the man should have done such things, and hoping, if it is in anyway possible, that somehow, sometime, somewhere, he can be cured and made human again." Is our own brokenness what's missing in expressing how we feel about (another's) sin? And what effect would that, combined with our hope for the other's restoration and healing, have on our witness and our world? |
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dropps is the greek word for droppas which is translated in the action of being dropped or in other words "drops"...greekianese is a artful form of language most casual Christians are not aware of :-) |
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| As God is generous with His grace so also sometimes we should generously repeat a consonant! |
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Good suggestion, Dan. I remember somebody (not here) slamming a preacher who was not preaching enough on sin during his mission work. The thought occurred to me, "just how much did Christ preach on sin?" The truth is that He became sin for us. Instead, in the beattitudes in Matt 5, He preaches of an anttitude of the heart. Most times when I go to judge somebody elses sin, the Holy Spirit quickly reminds me that in the past, I too had done those things. This is not to say that I condone sin, but I don't think there is something that we need to do, just be. We just live. I go out the door and often my travels and such, take me to places where I can share my faith, sometimes with groups of people. I like to assure them that God accepts them just as they are. I cannot change the heart of a man/woman, but HE can and does so in His own way, over time. Asking someone to change themselves very often just leads to dead works and inevitable failure. God is the One who must do the changing. If we ask someone to come to church, are'nt we just asking a sinner to come sit with a bunch of other sinners? There are extremes of course that may have to be dealt with, if somebody is disrupting things but even in such a case, a quiet word on the side will often suffice. The Lord has been changing my heart to see everybody as people, not as sinners and all the while my heart desires that none should perish. Cam. |
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Oh they can come to church, but they better not sit in my seat!!! And now the topic for the next blog... I am joking about the seat thing Cam...and well said. The Bible is specific that while we are to judge within the body, we are not to judge outside of it. Hazard |
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| Funny how that got twisted around, ain't it? Jesus used the image of being "fishers of men"--last time I checked you catch 'em before you clean 'em! |
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| In fact, we were supposed to be thrilled that we are allowed out on the boat! |
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Linda |
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March 17, 2007 at 11:16pm |
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| I did not read each and every comment to this blog so I don't know if my comment is going to be off the wall or not; but when I read this, I immediately thought of the account of the woman caught in the very act of adultery who was brought to Jesus. He did not accuse her, he gave her some sound advice, "Go and sin no more". He simply loved her. <>< |
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| More importantly than sound advice Linda...with those words He set her FREE...we are supposed to be offering those same words of freedom but we never will as long as we sit in the seat of a judge...good illustration |
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Linda |
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March 19, 2007 at 9:55am |
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| Yes, excellent point webyouthpastor! It's great to be free from the weight of sin that can so easily beset us. |
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Pastor Dan: Loved it. Simple. Powerful. True. My best, Marty Daniels |
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I met with this some time back when I used this, seemingly appealing line (maybe homosexuality was the topic? I can't remember,) and another person chimed in to say, "So you just hate the part of me that "sins" then, I see." Not at all what I meant, but the point had been made. It was at that point that I needed to remind myself what sin really was. Many people get caught up in this idea that sinning is disobeying one of those commandments listed back in Exodus and Leviticus and if you do all of that right, you'll be fine. The same people profess that we're all sinners because the Bible says so, but having been there myself, I'm thinking they don't really understand what they're saying when they preach this. Considering, though, that a sin is anything that comes between God and us, and that Christianity isn't about living some "perfect lifestyle" but about living out this wonderful relationship with our Creator; "sinner" really does take on a whole new meaning, then. Because who hasn't had a selfish thought? Who hasn't invested in pride? That puts us all in the same boat, and I think that's part of the ultimate message that so many of us miss on. It makes it not about fighting against this various act and that various act, but living in love for God because he loves us -- so much that He put us here though He knew we would fall into sin (away from Him,) so much that he sent His Son to redeem us from that sin (and bring us back.) And accepting that into our hearts, it becomes a journey through which we grow close with God, knowing and loving him, recieving his unending grace which we, in turn, pour out through our love to everyone around us. I think you make a wonderful point here, that it is the soul we must worry about first amongst the unsaved. Once that is won, the Spirit will guide the rest. (We really should learn to trust the Spirit more, that's part of having faith!) I also believe that as long as we attempt to attack the sin before we approach and truly love the sinner, we are going to create animosity and cause Christianity to look like a legalistic lifestyle instead of the freedom in Christ, the lifestyle of unending love, incomparable Godly love, that it was built to be. |
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Linda |
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March 21, 2007 at 9:34am |
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Just another thought, one that I'm sure we've all heard a thousand times.....you don't 'get good' and then 'get God'; you 'get God' and then 'get good'. I agree, we need to be epistles read of men and let our lives speak instead of our mouths. |
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