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| I Love Spam |
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So I am overwhelmed with the vast number of emails I receive on a daily basis.
Today, I found out that someone has been licensed to kill me and if I will pay them they will cancel the contract b/c they have sent their "boys" out after me to investigate me and the hitman doesn't think I am worthy of such cruelty...well thank you.
I also discovered that I have inherited a huge wealth if only I will send $2000 to cover all of the shipping fees from Africa they will immediately send me the millions this heiress has left for me since I am a pastor.
I also found out I won some huge lottery in England with kind of the same deal. I just have to cash a check they send me in my account and wire them the money and they will pay the legal fees for me and send me my money.
I get to get my colon cleansed for free...that is attractive
I can date tonight a variety of women from differing lifestyles
I can win 5000 by filling out surveys and explain for the 100th time whether I prefer Pepsi or Coke
I have won a new Dell, Gateway, Compaq, IPod, etc if I will only buy a timeshare in Disney and get cd's from columbia
I can get a new degree by doing nothing and make millions
I can work just a couple of hours a day on my computer and make up to 300000 a day.
I have 3451 women 232 men and 5 children crushing on me right now
I can treat my ulcers (I don't have any)
I can be cured of prostrate cancer
I can have free business cards
I can read part of some story but not be told the beginning, end, or even if I am close between the two
I should become a medical transcriptionist
I can fly free, drive free, ship free, and talk free if only I will buy crazy things and sign up to pay for 2 years for subscriptions no human could possibly be interested in like "grass growth measuring"
I have new classmates
Did I mention I could get my colon cleansed b/c there are several companies that wish to do that for me...
Funny enough, by the time I filter through the spam that made it past my "spam filter" I am too exhausted to read the emails that people have really sent me.
Somewhere in all of this is a parallel to our daily walk with the Lord. How much energy I lose each day filtering through things that made it past my filter that I should be spending on my walk with God...and when it is His "turn" at the end of the day I am too exhausted...what a shame.
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| I believe hell for the spammer will be having to sit at a computer and delete all of the millions of spam emails they sent throughout their shady career.......ONE by ONE!!! |
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| oh yeah...great spiritual lesson! lol |
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That would be great. They should have a hardened heart to other spammers as well so that they get spammed while they are deleting theirs AND there should be roll-over links on all of the "x" buttons that immediately sign them up to all other spammers
Or they should meet Jesus and create spam filters that actually work |
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| Patrick, great post. Life comes at us all the time. Many of us, myself included, start believing things are real if I hear them enough - kind of like spam. If I really want the truth, then I need to weed through the spam in life to find it...and hopefully not be too tired to digest it properly once I get it. Selah. |
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Well said, I should copy that and paste it in to the original, claim it as my own, then sue you for plagarism...
Anyways...Selah DC |
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| ha ha , love it, i have the same things offered to me, |
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Gene |
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March 08, 2008 at 6:55pm |
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Patrick, I'm being spammed to take surveys now. You too? Can you really make money by answering questions?
(Send $10 and complete the enclosed form)
lol |
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I have answered more surveys to the point I feel like the guy holding a double sided card that reads "directions on reverse side" on both sides...so I keep flipping and flipping...
No Gene, I have yet to make a dime on those things
Gary, don't go for it man!!! |
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| I am thinking of spamming myself actually |
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| You answered the surveys? oh no, no wonder you get more spam |
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Only at first...and on a different email. I keep an alternate email for all that experimental stuff. Sorry Shirlock, this case is still cold
I am a dork |
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| Yes, Eliza it is...and frustrating. Then you fill out those forms that promise not to send more and thatis a joke...I bet they put them there just for humor |
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| Yes Eliza!!! You get it!!! I wish somehow I knew what to do with those guys, I think they are planning to take over the world |
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| Love the spiritual parallel. So appropriate. |
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| Yeah Coreena, thanks. Got to fit that in there somewhere or else I might be seen as a complainer and the big internet people might come after me |
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WOW you rock!... boy have I been spamed by the evil and good. Life can come at you hard and fast...everyone needs to learn to
LL&P |
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Thanks Becky, i do play guitar, have been known to rock
What is LL&P? |
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Awe man! And I thought this post was about the stuff in the can! I love that stuff...
spam spam spam spam
J/K
sort of......(I do love the stuff)
I get tons of the junk mail in my inbox. And this was a great post Patrick. It truly was a good lesson for me as well. I also say a great big Amen to Mike's thoughts on the spammer's time spent in hell. :) |
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| Thanks Val...I don't care much for the other type either though |
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