I did a search, but this whole page had me laughing out loud, so I'll just paste it to you:

http://louisvilleemmaus.com/jokes2.html 

Enjoy! :-) 

Here's one I received from a friend in Houston this morning.

As a young minister, I was asked by a funeral director to hold a graveside service for a homeless man, with no family or friends. The funeral was to be held at a cemetery way back in the country, and this man would be the first to be laid to rest there.

As I was not familiar with the backwoods area, I became lost; and being a typical man did not stop for directions.  I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the backhoe and the crew, who were eating lunch, but the hearse was nowhere in sight.

I apologized to the workers for my tardiness, and stepped to the side of the open grave, where I saw the vault lid already in place. I assured the workers I would not hold them up for long, but this was the proper thing to do. The workers gathered around, still eating their lunch. I poured out my heart and soul.

As I preached the workers began to say "Amen," "Praise the Lord," and "Glory!" I preached, and I preached, like I'd never preached before, from Genesis all the way to Revelation.

I closed the lengthy service with a prayer and walked to my car. As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I overheard one of the workers saying to another, "I ain't never seen nothing like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."

Septic tank!!??

ROFLOL!

Got one the other day on line...I'll try to remember it...

After much nagging, the husband agreed to accompany his wife on a tour of the Holy land during the week before Easter Sunday.  The American couple, in their mid-eighties, toured all of the typical sites, but on a long hike several days into  their tour, the wife fell ill and died.  The couple had no children and no significant relatives back in the states.  The tour guide told the husband that there was a special burical service done in the Holy Land for $300 American dollars.  The man told the husband that it would be a fitting tribute to his wife's life and death.

The man said "No way!"

The tour guide informed the husband that it would cost approximately $4500 to prepare and ship his wife's body back to the states.  It could be lenghty and time consuming.

Again the husband shook his head and said "No way!"

The tour guide tried to convince the man that it would be the cheapest and beast course of action.   The husband finally interupted the tour guide and said "LOOK...the last person that was buried here at this time rose again in three days... and I just can't take that chance!"

ha... thats a good one

A minister was asked to give a talk on sex at a marriage retreat.  He agreed to do it, but when his wife asked what he was going to speak about, he was embarrassed, and he fibbed to her.

"I'm going to talk about s...ailing." 

After the retreat had come and gone, a woman in the congregation said to the  minister's wife "How knowledgeable your husband was at the marriage retreat.  He gave such a nice talk, my husband and I could really relate."

"Well, I don't know how he could know so much about it. I'm pretty sure he has only done it twice, and the first time his hat blew off, the second time, he threw up."

I heard Max Lucado tell that one on his podcast. Actually it is his church's teaching series on Sex.  I had no idea he could be *funny*.

lololololol