I hope someday my life will be an open book after all the word sais what is done in private will be shouted from rooftops. At first when I was only seeing one escape (Drugs) there were many secrets that I hoped to take with me to the Grave. however now the Grave ceases to be the end. It's a beginning and I need to remember what the word sais. 1: 6If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. 7But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all [a] sin. 8If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. 9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 10If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives.
I've lived from hand to Bottle/Pill for the last half of my adolescence to my early 30s. Then it was hand to mouth, but continuing in debt. Always thinking I'll get out of debt when my ship comes in.
The Holy Spirit knows how to convict. But the enemy of our soul in this case assisted by Mammon knows how to condemn and accuse. The enemy likes t remind me that this is the way it's always been. I'll never change. Which is partly true left to my own carnal devices. even the lord said Without him I can do nothing, but it's also true that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
I know I'm not the only one going through this furnace.19Then Nebuchadnezzar was filled with (A)wrath, and his facial expression was altered toward Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego. He answered by giving orders to heat the furnace seven times more than it was usually heated. 20He commanded certain valiant warriors who were in his army to tie up Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego in order to cast them into the furnace of blazing fire. 21Then these men were tied up in their (B)trousers, their coats, their caps and their other clothes, and were cast into the midst of the furnace of blazing fire. 22For this reason, because the king's command was (C)urgent and the furnace had been made extremely hot, the flame of the fire slew those men who carried up Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego. 23But these three men, Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego, (D)fell into the midst of the furnace of blazing fire still tied up. 24Then Nebuchadnezzar the king was astounded and stood up in haste; he said to his high officials, "Was it not three men we cast bound into the midst of the fire?" They replied to the king, "Certainly, O king." 25He said, "Look! I see four men loosed and (E)walking about in the midst of the fire without harm, and the appearance of the fourth is like a son of the (F)gods!" 26Then Nebuchadnezzar came near to the door of the furnace of blazing fire; he responded and said, "Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego, come out, you servants of the (G)Most High God, and come here!" Then Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego (H)came out of the midst of the fire. Thanks for bearing with me my friends as I go through this. I think it's going to be important as I go through this to remember not to take things for granted. And to remember to be there for the next person wanting free of Mammon. I sometimes feel like one of the demon possessed men that Jesus freed of Legions. First I was freed of Addictions, then lust pornography, then cigarettes, then filthy language. Each new battle seems to be the most terrifying.
Blessings,
David
P.S. if any one cares this is today's log from my personal journal. slightly edited.
03/14/08 *** Closing the Circle...***
Tithes Average $69 every 2 weeks.
Mortgage 3/12/08 I talked to The Banker at 1st Financial Bank who insists on payments for 02/08 & 03/08 which total over $750 be remitted by 03/17/08 As I type this I'm very scared. I know a big part of this is a stiring that's is supposed to do me good. I'll have to think long and hard before signing on a dotted line again concerning debt. I also know I need to remain open to fellow Christians before going into debt. I need to heed councel of wiser christians than me. Christians that are aware of the snares that Mammon likes to set to trap God's people. I need to come up with a closed circle concerning living expenses. This is just a start. They shut off my Gas today. I'm grateful it was relatively warm. I know this is just a start. But I need to keep it on paper so that I'll remember after I'm delivered and I wont take it for granted. Verizon $53.25 03/17/08
Electric $140.00
Gas $???
Water $???
????? Credit card Bureau of Collection and Recovery
????????????? $2917.82
????????????? Credit Card Account inquiry (888)408-6572 $103.91
????????????? Credit card $1300.00
Blessings,
David |
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