To Know His Presence

            In my meditation this morning I was contemplating on what it meant to be in the presence of the Lord.  It is ever in my heart to be submitted unto Him, and that I endeavor to be at all times, as I never want to miss hearing His voice, but there are times that I find myself having to search for Him, to renew my awareness of His presence, if you will.  It is during those times that I feel unconnected from Him in some way, as there is this quietness, a silence in the heavens so to speak.  I am very much aware that He is ever present within me, so when I begin to feel this absence of presence, this silence in my heavens, I know that it is me out of touch or sync with Him, and not Him with me.   I am certainly aware of what causes this to happen, and I also know the remedy, yet I find myself yielding to that element of independence, self will, that disharmony that has a tendency to rise up within me if I allow it to rise up unchecked, when my attention has been drawn away on other things and I’ve gotten busy doing, doing and doing.  When I begin to feel the tug of the Holy Spirit, it stirs within me the need to tune in to hear the sound of His voice again, to feel His embrace, and to commune with Him, and it is then I begin to call out to Him, reaching for that comfort that can only be found in Him, reaching out to touch him to know that I am in His presence once again.

I have this intense desire within me to hear Him beyond my mental interpretation or verbal explanation of what He is, beyond the words and the rhetoric.  I think sometimes that I tend to acquiesce to the present circumstances and all too quickly at times, lose sight upon Him.  I am learning to quiet my mind so I can listen and hear His voice.  I have come to the conclusion that I, in my past, have always liked being in control of the direction my studies went, what messages I was to give, or what writing I was to produce.   I am not doubting that it was the inspiration of the Holy Spirit that nudged me in that direction to find the truth, but yet many times someone would present a topic by asking a question, or my motivation was that I would see something wrong with something someone was teaching and I would set out to set the matter straight in my writings or in my message; “fix it.”  It has become very clear to me that if the Holy Spirit doesn’t fix it, it will never be fixed.  I want my motivation only to be to lift up and exalt the glory of my heavenly Father.  I so desire to speak that which builds, has purpose, brings hope, encourages, strengthens, inspires and teaches.  This setting here with my hands on the keyboard ready to type, waiting upon the leading and inspiration of the Holy Spirit before I type, is quite a bit different then the busy activity I was caught up in before.  Oh the challenge of letting God be God within me.

            More and more as each day goes by, I am even more aware that Jesus Christ the Savior of the world, lives within me as the Word of God, the living abiding indwelling Truth.  I accept the Living Word of Life abiding within me as being the essence, the living substance of my anointed Messiah (Savior, Christ).  I believe that when He came to the earth, He came as the embodiment, the living expression of the Word and Life of God.  I am persuaded that He opened the doorway for all of us to dwell in the heavens by baptizing us into the Spirit of Truth, the living Word.  I believe that He was and still is the birth Son of God the creator of the universe and that He came to be the manifestation of the life of His Father, the creator, upon the earth.  I believe that as He was the Word of God before He came as the man Jesus Christ, He was the living Word of God revealed in the flesh, that He is now the resurrected Word of Life made available to all, so that all can have life and have life more abundantly.  I believe that He was that seed of life which was planted into the earth, or heart of man, and through the cross and resurrection, He produced a great harvest on the day of Pentecost in the upper room which is still bringing forth fruit today and is being harvested.  I believe that He was, is and always will be, the reality of all that I can ever hope to attain to and to be, and that there is no other pathway to experience the life of God, except through Him and Him alone.  He alone as the living Word of God, holds the keys to our abiding in the kingdom of God.

            I began a daily vigil some time ago, of looking for Him; training my senses to tune in, to be sensitive to who He is within me.  I know that there are no accurate descriptions, no pictures of Jesus available, so any image I might produce in my mind of what He looked like would not be accurate to anyone else but me.  The truth is that I do not necessarily desire an image of a man because it somehow limits His awesomeness, His greatness, His being, yet that is unfortunately the only image I am able to relate too.  All of the studying and research that I have done, all of the wonderful faithful Christian people that I have shared my life with, all of the messages I have received into my heart and all of my intimate personal experiences and time with Him, have served to form a picture of Him and describes what He is to me. 

Each morning I close my eyes and visualize Him walking before me, guiding me, preparing the road before me.  I do not move the focus of my eye until I clearly see Him ahead of me, and only when I do, it is then that I turn and look behind me with my minds eye, and I wait until He comes into full focus, and it is then that I know He is there, ever watching my back.  I turn my face to my left and then to my right and I do not move my eyes until He becomes visibly clear.   I look down and visualize Him as the Living Word, and that each nugget of truth that I gleam from that days searching, adds one more board or stone upon the house that He is building out of me, with Himself being the firm foundation upon which my house is being built.  I look heavenward and visualize Him covering me with His love and focus in on His presence within me.  My favorite is when I can see Him standing all around me; everywhere I look I see Him.   I want to know Him as my ever present salvation, both inside my heart and outside, and my prayer is that in all that I do, let it be a testimony of Him, of His glory, and that it point others to Him.  As I do this each morning, I feel a comfort, a security, a peace settle over me.  Oh the joy of being in harmony with life, instead of focusing upon the struggles of the past.   

            I have discovered that at least for myself, I don’t have the desire to wrestle over the issues that have kept the church body so divided.   As I seek for understanding, as I seek to grow in Him, as I focus upon His glory, all of the issues just seem to fall away and disappear as He reveals Himself within my being.  I find that I no longer have to defend anything about me or what I believe anymore, for His love covers me and He testifies of Himself and validates the reality of His presence within me, without me having to prove anything.  In that resting place in Him, words are no longer adequate to explain who He is, for it is only in that intimate place in Him, that all the warring ceases, the old is passed away and new life begins, fresh and vibrant, full of hope and vigor.  It truly is a new day.  Blessings, Dave Garner