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we have been married for almost six years. we were platonic friends for ten years before we married. we married when he came to the Lord. he stayed with the Lord for a couple years, and has now lost all interest. he says he wants nothing to do with God.
I mourn for him. I mourn for how we used to be. we would have Bible study every night. we would hold hands and pray. we were becoming one. one in the Spirit. one in our marriage. one.
now we are becoming two. his constant misery is painful to me. it wears me down - physically and emotionally. i don't want to be around his misery. and his words sound like he doesn't want me around, either.
I never believed in setting ultimatums, but I did yesterday. WE need help. WE need help because we both say we want to stay together, yet, he is miserable. he is hateful. he belittles everyone. he hates everything. time to choose: find a church to attend together, or see a counseler. of course, I prefer church. he prefers neither. but, he must choose, because the only other option is for me to leave.
becoming two doesn't happen overnight. when we become, we are going through a preocess. becoming is a process. we WERE becoming one. it was beautiful to become one. i want it back, Lord. i want it back.
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