| Hope and the Father's love |
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Tonight I found myself starting to slip down off the mountaintop I have been on the last couple of weeks(Thanks Mike...snicker). It wasn't a major falling down, but one that felt like the beginning of the slide into depression that used to be my bread and butter. As I was slipping into those familiar feelings, God led me to a blog I had saved from a young acquaintance from the Boundless website. This young wife of an Orthodox priest always seems to touch my heart in ways that are almost too deep for words. She's written about death and grief, about grieving with her friend Rachel at the loss of her husband in Rachel's Tears, and tonight I read a old blog I had saved on hope. Funny how tenuous our faith is that we can go from faith to despair in a single day, yet even in this slip, I find myself understanding the faith of the Apostle. They went from a mountaintop feeding the 5000, and the joyful innocence of setting with the people listening to the Beatitudes, to seeing Lazarus raised from the dead. Then, in a moment, they abandoned, and then there's Peter:
22:34And he said, I tell thee, Peter, the cock shall not crow this day, until thou shalt thrice deny that thou knowest me. Whew, talk about up and down. My failures aren't often that extreme, but still, after 30 years you would think I'd have everything straight, right? What I have gained is speed at repenting. When I fall I get back up quicker, and move towards God's arms instead of running away from Him. I find myself a sucker for hope, and that is not a bad thing. Hope keeps despair from setting in and leading me into the dark places of depression. Oops, there it is, I said that word that is supposed to be foreign to victorious Christians, but yet, at times I have slid into that deep hole. I don't often go there anymore, God has given me a suite of armaments to use against it, and one of them is you all in my church in Versailles, and on MyChurch. Thanks you for being Christ to me!
I'll close with a quote from the last article I mentioned by Jenny S., written in the journal of a young friend who was leaving his family behind, due to terminal cancer. It is about true hope....and Him.
"As we find hope," Jarrod wrote, "We find evidence that He's just been here. Hope is the bread crumbs that God leaves for us, not just to find our deepest desire or dream — but Him." Jarrod Voltz |
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