Just some of the universal laws you probably didn't learn in school...

1.  Law of Off-Setting Pressure 
The application of pressure to the human ear with a cell phone device causes an immediate decrease in pressure applied by the human foot to the gas pedal of an automobile.

2. Law of Primary Space
The driving of a large vehicle, such as a van, results in a behavior pattern of the driver whereby they will always park their large vehicle in the front spots in an aisle at Wal-Mart, thus making it impossible to see around them to watch for oncoming traffic.

3. Law of Distorted Perception
The development of grey hairs, particularly in males, pulls vital chemicals out of the brain, leaving the individual with a belief that the owning of a convertable with somehow make you look younger - even though the use of a convertable causes the grey hairs to blow in the wind, thus drawing extra attention to themselves.

4. Law of Increased Decrease
With the addition of every teen into a car comes a related decrease in the ability of a teen driver to drive with any sense of responsibility. 

5. Law of Denial
This explains why drivers who smoke will roll their windows down for fresh air rather than keep the windows up and enjoy their habit to the fullest.