Due to the need of a friend, I've been experiencing what it's like to have four kids in the house for a few days now. As we have been awaiting a match via domestic adoption with a pair of siblings (translation- there are two children somewhere we believe God has chosen for us, we just don't know who they are, or where) this has been a good chance to taste a smidgen of a sudden addition of two more children. As these two we're watching come from a happy, healthy home to which they can easily return and find security, their mental and emotional health is quite different from what we'd find via adoption, most likely. Nevertheless it has been educational to have had a window into this world of insta-growth. Two children have been used to being the oldest, making choices with wisdom and experience which often puts them in a position of power over the younger sibling, and seeing them together as they work through who's the boss has been a challenge for us all. The younger siblings have gotten their way through subtler methods, whining, or out and out temper tantrums, and this is fairly exhausting. Having all four together, getting acquainted with individual personalities and the different energy outputs and preferences had me in bare survival mode yesterday. It was my first full day with them, and I had a huge sleep deficit from the start, having had poor sleep and little of it for a few nights prior. Today I enjoyed them all more, imagining it to be a foster child like situation, which both Kevin and I experienced as we grew up. We have chosen not to go that route for adoption as we found it heartbreaking to be separated after bonding, which happens in many instances. In this case, it's make believe and free from expectation of permanency, so simply a training opportunity and case study in my own coping and my children's interactions. Elijah was amazingly helpful to me yesterday when I found myself unprepared in a diaper changing moment, and he ran around getting me various needed items with surprising ability. He also has surprised me by today deciding he needed to be a baby, making faux crying noises and making a plea for attention. He has been pestering, chasing, and otherwise annoying the girls, wanting to be included and yet not getting that his little boy in-your-face activities are generally not going to win them over. Pouting and splashes of tantrum have been directed at the offenders, which has actually not been me, so not as hard for me to deal with as when he is offended at me. When we got outside in a kiddy pool in the later hours today, he was in his element and actually got along swimmingly (could not help myself) in the boisterous activity and tolerance of the others. Joyanna has turned three and a half today and I'm amused at how well she has interacted with a girl years older, but unhappy that she would so quickly exclude her brother in the 'girls only, no boys allowed' club. All of this immediacy of a friend is to her delight- she has been begging to go to any friends' home for weeks, days, hours, and minutes ... All the olders are in the bedroom for sleep (it is late, nearly 10:30) and not appearing to be nearing any winding down. Joyanna just ordered the older girl to get back in bed, and she listened! lol! No shrinking violet, my little J Rose! I am very curious what the future holds, and am content with our family at four but open to whatever God wants to do in and through us... and very blessed for the opportunity to bless a friend in need and share our home. We have been so blessed by many others, it's nice to give back. Well, having just threatened them with 20 lashes (just kidding) I have heard a good amount of quiet and may actually attempt some sleep now. God's blessings, all (even you spammers) and may you know the abundance of His love and the true nature of His justice, grace, mercy and forgiveness. |