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| Flight from Bondage..wrote 8 years ago |
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It's 2:00 Tuesday morning the 23rd, 2000. I'm sitting here and the Holy Spirit takes me back to April, 1991. Driving down the road, an everyday task for almost everyone. When all of the sudden, my heart, feels like it's going to jump out of my body because it's beating to fast! I felt, out of control and that I was going to die. Seeing a Big coal truck in front of me, seemed like the end of my life...
I pulled off to the side of the road for a moment. I wanted to try to get some control, of what was going on with my body so I could get back home..That really was, a long journey home, to the arms of God...
Just take a moment and think of all the things you have enjoyed in life. I was one of you, at one time. It all started, that I couldn't go out of a five-mile radius in a car, in any direction...
I refused, to go to the local store because I was afraid, that I was going to lose control and that people would laugh at me. I did my Christmas shopping, out of catalogs or wrote lists for my family, to pick up for me. I sold Avon for four years and had to give that up. I loved doing it but how do you sell something and can't get your orders delivered. My husband said he would, take me around and help me do the job...
I said, "no, that it was my responsibility and not his." He already had to do the grocery shopping, pick up the mail and go to the bank. So I decided to quit, like everything else in my life! I was a prisoner, in my own home for seven years. A bird in cage, that couldn't get out because the door was locked from the outside...
I didn't understand, what was happening to me. I did know, that GOD knew! I found out, that I was having panic attacks. It had full control of my life! The whole time, I would cry out to GOD and ask for help. I knew He wouldn't give me more, then I could bear...My family stood by me because you see they loved me. I think that love kept me on sort of a level...so I didn't think that I was going crazy or losing my mind. I would think to myself, that I was going to be like this, the rest of my life...
One day in 1998, there was a ray of hope. Through my Chiropractor, I met a woman who said, "my body was like a person addicted to heroin." She told me," it world take a year or more to be healed." With the guidance of GOD, We started my healing sessions. We both felt the presence of GOD...
Healing was starting to take place. She told me, "I was dead spiritually and needed spiritual food." I knew what she was saying, was the truth. For you see, I had asked Jesus into my heart. There was trouble in the church we were attending and we needed to leave...
We searched for a year, for a church. Until one day, a friend who moved from Florida, invited me to the church she was attending. I thought it would be like the other churches, that we didn't fit in. I went anyway because it was a new work in the making, of 15 months...
I walked in the door and felt the Love of God, before anyone spoke to me. As I stood and sang, my spirit soared and God said, "I was finally home!" Oh the Joy and Glory that flooded over me...Right at that moment, satan was defeated. Remember when I said, "I was like a bird in a cage." Well, Jesus opened that door and told me to fly-fly-fly and never look back because there were only broken feathers, on the bottom of that cage...
I'm an eagle now and been flying ever since! I praise God for where I was, for where I'm at now and for where I'm headed...Joy unspeakable and full of Glory!!
40:31 But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.
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Go Lassie!!
What a mighty God!! |
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| ps... I used to have a friend who experienced panic attacks. He said they felt like a heart attack. Until he figured out what they were he was terrified. |
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Mrs W |
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July 21, 2008 at 8:08am |
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Thank You Lord for finding M- delivering her.
We love you and know that He has a wonderful "work" for you to contribute
in this life - we are blessed that you are here.
Imagine how many people are suffering from what you did and are tormented?
I pray God uses you ----
xoxoxoxoxoxxoxo |
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a very beautiful testimony, Them panic attacks are no fun..I get them every now and then and what I do is seek and see why..I refuse to allow it control me now..it try to but it lost it own battle..
Thank you for sharing this .. |
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I am so blessed to know you as a friend Cella Jean!
Fly Free my friend! Fly High!
GO GOD! |
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Bubbles, Yes... What a mighty God!!
Mike, Thank you so much! "used to have a friend who experienced panic attacks." Are you still friends?
Grammy, Thank you!
Mrs W, Thank you..."we are blessed that you are here." I'm blessed to be here! I wasn't going to put this up...I'm glad my mind set, had changed...This was my 3rd blog I put up, on October 31, 2007.So when I left, all my blogs did also.
Shelley, Panic attacks belong in the pit of hell.. When you know what they are and you are not going to die, that makes a world of difference. People, that never had the full blown attacks, can never really understand..huh
Val, Well, cella jean is so blessed to know you as a friend :)
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| Love ya lady......I so know where you were coming from! hmmmm, there's a blog a-brewing!!!!! |
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| Good to have you around my friend! |
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Kathy |
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July 22, 2008 at 5:55am |
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| Beautiful testimony, M! TGBTG! Thank you for sharing such a personal journey! |
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Cindy, Jeff and Kathy, Thank you! |
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awesome testimony!! Thank you for sharing, although I wasnt a shut in I was SHUT IN my addiction for so many years Till God opened the doors for me and told me to fly!
How awesome is our God!!!
Thank you again!!!!!!! |
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| I love getting a peep into the lives of my ppl's I love on here. It helps me to better understand the person you are today! and I love who you are! And God ain't finished with ya or any of us yet! xoxoxoxoxoxoxo |
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| Donna & Lara, Thanks for stopping by..IT MEANS ALOT TO ME! :) |
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| hi there, i think your story is inspiring.. really, but its not reality for some of us, my anxiety came on me suddenly as well, but my dad was already dead and my mom had just been dignosed with terminal cancer, i had no other family support, so it got worse and worse. Having support means everything and i dont have it, and many dont.. so i am happy for you.. but the outlook isnt quite as good for me and others like me.. |
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September 13, 2008 at 1:45pm |
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Anna, Thank you for reading my story..I thought there was
no hope for me, either..Never forget there's always hope!
That hope, is in the Lord..you need support, I'm here for you! |
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