To recap my previous blogs, in blog one I began by discussing my ex-neighbor Olivia’s murder, the difference religion made in my life and developing a relationship with Jehovah: as well as experiencing TRUE repentance. In blog two, I explained how Olivia’s murder caused me to begin reflecting on my past experiences and how ignoring the “still small voice” that warns us of unforeseen dangers can impact our lives on different levels.  I briefly explained how my choices and behaviors, after conversion, contributed to my spiraling back into the world of sin. I talked about past relationships, what it meant to be accepted, respected, and loved unconditionally, and rededicating my life to God. I ended my blogs by stating that for the last “six years I have CLEARLY heard that ‘still small voice’ warning me of unseen dangers, and although I have both repented and experience conversion, I have not always heeded its warning”.

Needless to say, repenting and resubmitting my life to God has been the best decisions I ever made. I QUICKLY chose God and single parenting over living a life of sin: I decided it was better to live a life pleasing to God than to walk in the counsel of the ungodly or stand in the way of sinners (Psalm 1). After the birth of my son, God began to show up and show out like never before, I inherited my family home and landed a great paying job. God also placed a hedge of protection around me and my son and because of this we NEVER endured hardship. During that time I also continued to read the Bible. Scripture taught me that my son was on LOAN from God and I offered his life back in service to Him. My son was offered up as “Jeremiah Joseph Williams” because I acknowledged his life should reflect that of the Prophets of old: the Old Testament had played such an important role in my conversion, naming my son after these men is an everyday reminder of what an awesome God I serve. Needless to say, I was ill prepared for single parenting. Yet, God made a way at every turn: insuring all of our needs were met. Exactly one year after Jeremiah was born I was laid-off from my job (Hotel Management). However, even this did not deter me because at that point my confidence in God had grown a great deal:  losing my job did not cause me one iota of anxiety.  God quickly turned my trial in triumph: I was offered the opportunity to attend college. I started classes exactly two weeks after I lost my job. A week after I started classes a complete stranger enquired if I knew anyone who would be interested in a position as an Office Assistant, I answered I was and she hired me on the spot: all this occurred while we were working out at the gym. The job was at the same campus I was attending and worked around my class schedule, so they was never any conflict, can you say “God places us in the right place at the right time”? However, God was not through with me; two years into my degree program I discovered I could NOT earn my Degree on the Island, if I wanted to pursue a Degree in Mathematics I would have to relocate. I was nervous about relocating, but I quickly decided that if God brought me to it then He would bring me through it as well. I decided to relocate to Florida because seventy-five percent of my family resided there. The move was by no means flawless and although we encountered a few obstacles along the way, God kept His” hedge of protection around us”.  In less than six months I was blessed with reliable transportation, a great job, nice apartment, wonderful private school for Jeremiah, and I started classes that fall. In no time at all we settled into a routine and still we wanted for nothing because God continued to provide us with everything we needed and even some of the things I WANTED.

We lived a pretty quiet existence for the first year. I took care of Jeremiah, studied hard, and consistently gave God praise for the life that He had awarded us; nevertheless, a little voice inside kept reminding me over and over again that I was undeserving of His grace and mercy.  I was continually reminded of the hedge that God had surrounding my life and because of this I developed a love for the “Book of Job”.  Job was a man after Gods heart (mine as well); see, the Devil recognized God’s love for Job and challenged God to remove the hedge He had surrounding Job’s life. Satan was convinced that once the hedge was removed Job would curse God to His face. Needless to say, every time I encountered challenges I found myself referring back to the “Book of Job”; I developed great admiration for this Man of God and blogged about his character on more than one occasion. On some level, I related to Job because I recognized that I had a hedge around my life as well. I sensed it daily and at times I wondered how I would handle life if God removed His hedge. At that point in my life I still felt like a babe in Christ and more importantly, like a baby bird, I was ready to leave God’s  nest and soar like eagles. Finally after four years, I was ready for God to remove His HEDGE of protection and allow me another opportunity to live a life pleasing to him.

The Bible states, “Ask and it shall be given”, three months later God began removing His hedge of protection. I can honestly say that because God has been SLOWLY removing His hedge of protection, I can clearly see where I have grown and where there is still room for growth. On the other hand, I can also say with certainty that there is nothing I cannot trust God to handle. I have come a mighty long way in the Lord; I KNOW that I have more faith than a MERE” mustard seed”. I had learned how to call God on His promises and I was not afraid to remind Him of what He has promised in His words. Once God began to lower the hedge Satan began by attacking my Faith. Scripture states, “Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen”. I realized that without Faith it truly is impossible to please God.  When I was forced to quit my job because the company changed management, that was NOT an issue for me because I trusted God to provide something better and he did. The new manager constantly scheduled me to work during class hours; in so doing, forcing me to choose between income and education: I chose education.  Because of my Faith, God placed me in the right place at the right time yet again. I was taking a “Technology for Educators” class and at the end of the semester the Professor offered me a position in her department: I quit my job two weeks prior. I accepted the position and have been working at the college ever since. Next, when my car started acting up, I trusted God to meet my needs by providing me with another car and in less than two months He met that need as well. Needless to say, I was on cloud nine, by God’s grace I was learning how to soar like an eagle and it felt good to no longer be considered a “babe in Christ”. It took me thirty–six years but I finally discovered a place of peace and contentment and I had ONLY God to thank for this. For the first time I was genuinely happy; so much so that it radiated from the very depths of me. The transformation was so extraordinary that everyone I encountered remarked on how happy I appeared; one individual commented that she could see God radiating through me (this was the highest compliment I had ever been given). At this point there was only one thing missing in my life, a significant other.  I had taken myself completely off the dating scene and not dated seriously for four years and was ill-prepared for my next challenge. I met someone whom I felt sure both loved and feared God; I was certain he was a good role model, friend, and possessed husbandlike qualities.

To Be continued