Luke 22:61-62

61 And the Lord turned and looked at Peter. Then Peter remembered the word of the Lord, how He had said to him, "Before the rooster crows, you will deny Me three times." 62 So Peter went out and wept bitterly.

Some of you may have heard that I recently left for a week to camp with my family. Little did I know that God had surgery in mind for me as I sat by His fire every night.

On the way there, I listened to Greg Laurie tell me a little more about his story - a story of how he came to know Christ as his Lord and Savior. In his telling, he shared his first encounter with a woman on a beach where he lived as he went out to intentionally share his faith with others. I leaned in with peak interest as I know the Lord has been speaking to me on this very subject. He shared how he carefully picked an older woman who didn’t look too intimidating and sat down next to her with a booklet that contained a 4-step approach to share his faith. He led her through it, word-for-word, and then asked her the question at the end which read, "Is there any reason that you can think of that should keep you from accepting Christ as your Lord and Savior," to which she replied "NO!" He was astonished...and became afraid, thinking "Oh, I wasn’t expecting that! NOW WHAT!?!"

Of course, I smiled knowingly and laughed at his response, but also found myself letting out a deep sigh from my heart which revealed an understanding of his fears at such a tremendous feat.

As a young Pastor Greg gathered himself, he remembered to lead her through a prayer, the same prayer he had said when he accepted Christ not too long before. He did not experience anything emotional or otherwise when he said it, but God responded faithfully as He always does when one is true. However, after the woman prayed she said she "felt something" as some report they do and he was filled with joy as he had "his first taste of what it would be like to be used by God."

As I listened, I was more sure than ever that it was time for me to be obedient to share my faith with others whenever possible, starting with my vacation.

Matt 10:32-33

32 "Therefore whoever confesses Me before men, him I will also confess before My Father who is in heaven. 33 But whoever denies Me before men, him I will also deny before My Father who is in heaven.

Our first day we met an nice couple with two little girls who’s camper was parked beside us. They had been there for a week, and would only be there until the next day. I wondered if I would have an opportunity to be a witness for Christ to them. I spoke with them frequently, but it never seemed "right." My mind was always saying things like, I don’t want to "freak them out" or make them feel uncomfortable by my bringing God up, so I settled on telling the man that I saw a chipmunk dig out one of those mysterious holes into the ground of the corner of my eye (next to his beer cans on the ground, I noted) in their camp "while I did my morning Bible study"....pretty weak fishing. Not even a bite....then they left.

The second time I felt prompted to share my faith was with a group just a few spots down who had kids the same age as ours. They played together, again just like they did with the first couple’s kids but they were much less friendly than them. In fact, every night when the sun set there was the onset of "adult fun" that is all too common in our family campgrounds...more drinking. Having done it too for a time, I say this to you with a heart of sadness rather than one that is on a throne of judgement....

They also played "scary" music loudly too, which made me even more afraid to approach which led to another failure as fear won over inside me. I did have an opportunity to speak as one of the men from the camp came over into ours to borrow a scouring pad...to which I happily complied as I coward behind my mask of Christian glee. Maybe subconsciously hoping to impress him with my "Christian" countenance....??? Soon too, they were gone.

The third time I felt the Spirit’s prompting at the opportunity to do the work of my Master was with a very nice couple who came to our campsite neighborhood just a day before we were to leave. I had noticed the very kind way about this couple who was seated on a wagon-ride not far from myself and our two older children at my side. It was a rainy day so the ride had been delayed but later resolved to "give it a whirl." After several people thought better of the attempt and got off at the first few drops of rain, we decided to stay on. So there we were, the troopers (vs. "the wimps," I playfully thought on board)...when it started to pour! Not only did it come down in buckets, but it hailed too! We were astonished! I then pulled our children even closer to me as we shivered and laughed at the same time on what seemed like the longest wagon ride ever! We were only on for a few minutes, but it was very uncomfortable to say the least! As I looked around, I saw this man’s face...smiling, like mine! He laughed too - a good belly laugh while many of us simply squealed or sat in as a silent statue. I remember thinking that he looked like a Christian, but I want to make sure given the right opportunity.

The next day our kids played with theirs, much like the other two times I described. The man even came over into our camp to say "You can’t leave! Our kids are the same age and having a blast!" I understood his sentiment and told him how we had lost a couple of nice girls the second day of our camp-out.

There was so much time for me to say something about Christ....but I didn’t. Oh how I had hoped they would hear "Northern Christian Radio" playing in the background, or notice my Gal 2:20 necklace I proudly wore, or even perhaps thought it peculiar of me to be found reading my Bible each day! Yet, each time I let another opportunity pass by to serve my King.

The last day as we packed up to leave I heard a great sermon about the woman by the well in the book of John that morning and mindlessly found myself bringing over the remainder of our filtered water to their camp. How could I have missed that opportunity? I could have said something clever, but dull in my thinking... I missed that opportunity.

John 4:13-14

13 Jesus answered and said to her, "Whoever drinks of this water will thirst again, 14 but whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst. But the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life."

Every day I sat by our campfire, I read my Bible. Every day, I prayed and sought His face...and every day He spoke words of Life to my heart and mind, yet "three times" I failed to obey Him. I cannot tell you how lonely I left on this trip. Though my God was with me, though He fed me, loved me, gave to me and held nothing back...even in the loving presence of my family, I felt empty because I know that I disobeyed Him. This trip was transformational for me: I am simply not the same. I know that I must overcome my fear and share my faith with others to truly live the Christian life. Peter’s story came to mind as I prayed a simple prayer to my Lord just this night. I just said...."Keep speaking to me...keep talking to my heart."

I wonder how different I am than Peter...? Even more so, remember that he wasn’t filled with the Holy Spirit when he denied the Lord. If someone asked me if Jesus was my Lord today, unto death I know I would say yes...but what about when God says, "Go speak to them about me," and I don’t; Is there any difference?

I find myself wondering if it is sometimes easier to stand behind a pulpit and be a witness.... on "our territory - in His house" rather than out on the worldly’s territory, where we are outnumbered and it is seemingly more "theirs" than "ours" though we know that God owns it all. I know more than ever that I must serve the Lord in this way. Will you pray for me? I am filled with fear and am seeking the Lord to give me the courage I do not posses.

Lord, though I "denied" you three times, you were merciful to me, continually restore me...and show me your love - agape love.

John 21:15-17

15 So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, "Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me more than these?"

He said to Him, "Yes, Lord; You know that I love You."

He said to him, "Feed My lambs."

16 He said to him again a second time, "Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?"

He said to Him, "Yes, Lord; You know that I love You."

He said to him, "Tend My sheep."

17 He said to him the third time, "Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?" Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, "Do you love Me?"

And he said to Him, "Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You."

Just like Peter, I too have wept bitterly in my heart knowing Your kindness to me is just like that which you lavished on him. As many times as Peter had denied You, three times he was restored by your kindness, mercy, and grace. Though Peter did not understand Your method at that time, You restored him. 
Dearest Lord, I want to do the work you have called me to do because my deepest longing is to hear your voice say unto me... "Well done, my good and faithful servant." Nothing else will satisfy.