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| Taking down the rule.....Parenting with God's help |
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For months now we have been in a constant struggle with our 2 oldest children. You see going from a home where everything goes, to a home where we have rules and have chose to live right and obey God, is not easy for teens. And when we decided to start living right our teen rebelled. I don't know how many times I had one of the stand in my face and yell. Everything from, why cant you be like other parents to I remember when you did this. To say it was not an easy time, would be an understatement. It was rough!
You all know there are alot of really bad things out there, and our teen face them everyday. And many parents have stopped being parents and let their kids come and go as they please. Well I will not be one of those. With so many bad things in this world my house will be the one place, besides church, that they can go and be safe, and have good things to do. With kind words being spoken and hot meals, bedtimes & guidance. My Pastor said we as parents should hold the compass, that its not wise to let your kids hold it. I agree, there is so much wisdom in that.
I just kept remembering my Pastors words in a service months ago, "Others can do it, but you may not." And so we held true to the rules that we thought were good things for our children to follow. At one point writing them down and taping them on the dining room walls. Nothing seemed to work, they fought me every step of the way. My husband, agreed with the rules, but never really enforced them. I did. And my kids tried to pull every trick in the book to get me to give up. Then my Pastors told me to let my husband be the one to handle it. That when a mom enforces the rules, they resent it. But when a dad does, he is respected. Good advice, we noticed a change right way. Things just seemed to run alot smoother. He would deal with the problem, and I would go pray. No fight or arguing, finally peace in the house.
So yesterday, my brother was over and swore (he is not saved and has a drug/alcohol addiction problem). I didn't even have to say a word. My oldest soon walked into the dining room and pointed to the rule about swearing and said " Uncle Butch, you better read this." Then he just walked away like everything was as normal as possible. I was so proud of him. While praying last night, God told me I could take the rules down now, my kids were listening. wheeeeeeeeeewwwwwwww
I thank God that He has helped us through this rough period. I don't know what I would have done without His help and the wonderful Pastors He has given me. I'm not a perfect parent, and I know I have made mistakes. But as long as I continue to follow Him, I know that things are going to be ok. Once again showing me that all things are possible with Gods help!
And so yes, this morning pieces of paper with all the rules came down. In their place are the beautiful pictures of my children again. |
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| To add a comment to "Taking down the rule.....Parenting with God's help" |
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| September 10, 2008 |
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Wow - way to go Jackson - is it the suit? JK Go God! Proud of Brian and Shelly |
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| September 10, 2008 |
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Thank you Mrs W. I think the biggest thing we learned from this was, not to be afraid or to proud to ask for advice/help. We are so thankful that for your wisdom and help. God truely made you and Pastor our pastors. Just look at how long it took me to to get it right.
BTW I have offically made it one year! |
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| September 10, 2008 |
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Ohhhhh yeah!!!! |
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| September 10, 2008 |
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| Wonderful testimony Shelly...I remember when my boys were young and wanted to buck against authority, I had some rules too....I would post scriptures on the refrigerator since they stayed in there so much (smile) and would make them memorize scriptures from the book of Proverbs....Oh they huffed and puffed, and went through the WHY we can't be like other kids...and do what other kids do....I ignored them and went on to doing what I knew to do as a single parent....and all I knew was God....I tell you it paid off....The police department don't know my kids....they've never done drugs or drink alcohol...both of them are working out their soul salvation and are thankful that momma was hard on them....So I rejoice with you Shelly that you could take the rules down ;o) |
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| September 10, 2008 |
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This made me cry happy tears! Rejoice! Rejoice! Rejoice! Hugs to you for holding fast! "I have no greater joy than to hear that My children walk in truth." Glorious testimony! |
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| September 10, 2008 |
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| I am so happy for you. May your children begin to spend time in God's presence like never before. God bless you home. May your husband crave for the Word like never before. |
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| September 10, 2008 |
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Margie you are such a blessing to me, thank you for the encouragement. It is nice to know that someday they will apreciate it :)
Thank you Bubbles :) praying for you and your hubby! I hope all is well!
GrammyB you are so awesome! You have such a caring heart!
Destiny thank you for thinking of my husband, he needs it!
Love you all! xxxooo |
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| September 10, 2008 |
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He's around MC here some place- LOL
Love you! |
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| September 10, 2008 |
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| Yea for you! So many parents never get around to living "right in the light." As foster parents, we have the same experience. Kids come into our home ( and our boundaries) from homes where there are no rules. It takes a while, but kids thrive with discipline. Anarchy is no fun for anyone. |
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| September 11, 2008 |
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| Thank you Caryl, it's nice to know we are not alone : ) God Bless you for fostering children. |
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| September 11, 2008 |
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| There is lot to learn from your life and from this blog. Its encouraging to lot of christians to make their families, uncompromised to the lures of this world. You did your best, God did the rest. May the Lord bless your entire family members, especially the children to lead Gods children. I commit their lives to God to take control and use according to His plan for them. |
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