Note that I said "normal" 1st time visitors receive welcome packets and I am anything BUT normal!

My 1st time visit to Calvary Community Church (C3) last weekend was simply awesome!

I stick out like a sore thumb when I come rolling through the front doors of any church at lightning speed in my bright metallic-lime-green wheelchair. There is actually a strategy here in zipping around in a wheelchair like a maniac. Us "wheelers" get points for "screams" just like Mike and Sulley in the movie Monsters, Inc. I got the tip on how to produce the loudest of screams from Sulley himself a few years back:



Now don't worry, I'd never scare a child! I only do this to grownups by doing "dougnuts" around them in my wheelchair. However, we do lose points if we knock anybody down so we are exxtttrrrraaaaa careful to just let the unsuspecting feel the wind as we zoom around them.  :eek:  LOL

As soon as I make this grande entrance at C3, a wild woman leaps over the information booth counter madly running at me all the while carelessly swinging a Whomp It hammer clearing a beeline to where I was! This generated a unique volley of screams in itself so Cathy Diemer was hired on the spot to work with Mike and Sulley at the factory. (that'll be the topic of another blog one day)

Much to my surprise, Cathy tells me that the Whomp It hammer is for me and I am to throw it at Pastor Mark if I don't like the sermon that day. I was actually expecting a welcome packet that explained why my wife and I should expect Pastor Mark to be doing cartwheels during praise and worship. At least that is the type of info I get at other churches where folks feel free to raise their hands without the need of having to ask a question. LOL

As I enter the sanctuary, my heart has started pumping hard not knowing what exactly to expect. I figured I'd be placed in the back where the "wheelchair section" typically is so as to not be a distraction during the service. When I learned that the C3 folks had removed a chair up front just for me, I was elated. Now I could worship God without looking at how everyone else worships. (that'll be the topic of another blog one day too).

So here I am in the reverence of the sanctuary preparing for an awesome experience since I had such a rough time getting started this morning. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I see the Purple Sleeping Bag Lady approaching me. I'll admit that I was disappointed not to see that famous sleeping bag hanging on the wall somewhere like a church banner. Anyways... She hands me a small silver gift bag with white tissue nicely flowing from the top. Mary Ann leaned over and whispered in my ear that it was a small gift from her. I just knew it was going to be the autographed picture of her and the sleeping bag that I had requested a long time ago. As it turned out, it was even BETTER and is now graciously perched on my desk. I use it to scare the cats when I get bored. It winds up and makes a bunch of racket (I like noise-makers). Care to guess what it was? Nope... You're wrong! You'll have to wait a tad longer to find out.  :-P

The service was awesome! The praise and worship team sounded heavenly! Even Pastor Dan was allowed to speak just before Pastor Mark's sermon; as long as Pastor Dan did not take up more than 23 seconds of time. And Pastor Dan, being the highly disciplined Navy man he is, used up exactly 22.75029974 seconds! As for Pastor Mark's sermon, I never was inspired to throw the Whomp It hammer at him because his sermon on their Creed, what he would be looking at for the next four Sundays, was super! My wife even got a confirmation from Pastor Mark's sermon on something she had been praying about over the past week. TYJ!  God is AWESOME!

My wife and I were truly blessed by C3 and their members!

Finally, in lieu of the "welcome packet" that normal 1st time visitors would receive, I received some of the most thoughtful items that will not end up in the trashcan; not to mention the fact that every time my gaze comes across one of these items, I am going to immediately be reminded of my awesome 1st timer's experience at Calvary Community Church. Thanks and God Bless you all!

Dave

Oops... Almost forgot the parting shot of what I received. Sorry... No guarantees that you will receive similar items on your 1st time visit to C3 but I can guarantee you'll meet some wonderful folks that will bless you from the top of your head to the tips of your toes! And now, the picture... Drum Roll - PLEASE ! ! !

Whomp It hammer for use when I need to "vent" and my red Baltimore crab to scare the cats when they start pestering my dogs: