| Just feelings, I know i need god more |
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How can I say this I give and give of my self to my family, and I get junk and more crud, what do I need to do ?I dont claim to be a saint or anything but I do the best I can as a mom, nana and I still get ridicual its so much stuff going on and I try to just ask God to help me and I just keep hanging on to this and I try to just let it go, whats wrong with me what am I so afraid of that I cant, I feel really nothing but just frustration and pain, I dont want to get involve with any thing I have four kids serving and to me thats enough to deal with and I keep trying to be the mom and wife, nana I need to be but then I dont want to anymore..not that I mean give up in just being the strong mom, they all need me and I sometimes just feel like falling..I know im suppose to depend on God, its hard,,my mind is just going in many directions..they say hurtful things they are suppose to be family.I just know no matter what I love them and always will treat them as equal as I can.sometimes i just cant, I dont have eight arms. Is it wrong to try to keep the peace in my life and home.Well if it is then something is wrong with me, and I dont want pitty Iwould like understanding...Im how old and Im just lucky I never became a drunk....or a drug addicted person..I love my God and I just would like prayer..thanks. 10:14 But how are men to call upon him in whom they have not believed? And how are they to believe in him of whom they have never heard? And how are they to hear without a preacher? |
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