I do have to say one thing though:  Everyone's salvation experience and the process are different.  Eg.  My brother got born again and never swore again...OK, so he did once when I think it was the hood of a car came crashing down on his finger.  Me?  i got born again, people noticed a change, but I still cursed. I didn't use God's name in vain, but I used some other words, mostly when i was mad.  Was I born again? yes.  Did my potty mouth improve with time? Yes.  do i still swear right now?  YES!  I have outbursts of wrath I become so ashamed of, but the Lord has shown me only HE can overcome those and keep seeking HIm, be filled with His Word, and that will come out instead of cussing.

My husband thinks b/c he didn't do certain things after he got born again, no one else should, but it doesn't oft times work that way.  Again, a process.  But I know if we remain humble, willing and fully dependent upon the Holy Ghost, then He will complete the work He began in us.  :-) I hope you get what I'm saying...and not saying to you.  I don't want you to think I'm opposing what you're saying, but really it's so true.  I was radically transformed, yet I still said some bad words...yet I was radically transformed...so much so you could see it physically. I looked younger! Praise the Lord!

Oh my friend Lara,

I still too at times get angry, but now it is anger against unrighteousness, but the Holy Spirit rises up to the occasion and brings up the scriptures I needed for the moment and I calm right back down, like (be angry but do not let it cause you to sin).  Now, if I say no to the Holy Spirit's instructions, and go punch somebody out, then the Royal Law comes into effect and it will judge me for not loving my neighbor as I love myself and then I will be willfully sinning, (see what I mean)? It is all a process of being purified by the Holy Spirit.  G-d knows His children and he knows every thought.  I used to allow Satan to buffet my mind about sin, until one day I realized that the Holy Spirit was sent to help me and He will not walk out of me every time I had a bad thought, so my friend, I know what you are talking about.  We all have days when we mess up, Oh, but thank G-d for our intercessor, Jesus Christ who sits at the right hand of the Father, forever interceding for His chosen ones.  Father has invested a greal deal in His children and will not lose one of us. 

[star!]

Christ said to let the dead bury the dead.

In my mind, a lot of churches are just that..... dead, rotten corpses. 

When the preacher doesn't feed the sheep, they either die or move on to where they can get fed.

In my mind, the salvation message belongs outside the church, in the streets and by-ways, if the members are already saved, why keep trying to save them with the same type of salvation message. 

Also, the churches I have attended, have all had their little cliques. 

[star!]

Here is the reason more women are in Christ than men:

1 Corinthians 1:27-31
But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are, so that no human being might boast in the presence of God. And because of him you are in Christ Jesus, who became to us wisdom from God, righteousness and sanctification and redemption, so that, as it is written, "Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord."

Best regards,
Craig

Dear IHS All The Time,

Read my blog on this subject at:

http://www.mychurch.org/blog/413771/Why-do-men-hate-going-to-church

The blog generated a huge response. The consensus of the discussion boiled down to seven issues:

1) Failure to let men lead. This may be controversial, but it was the most-often mentioned reason, both from men and women who commented. Many blamed women who would not let men be leaders in church, others, especially men, blamed the men for not taking their leadership role.

2) Overemphasis on relationships. Women are social beings and love relationships; men not so much. It is interesting that this was the most common answer given by women who shared why their husbands did not come, but it was also mentioned by several men. Telling men they need a "personal relationship" with Jesus and "fall in love with Jesus" does not appeal to men.

3) Overemphasis on sensitivity. "Gentle Jesus, meek and mild" and "sharing what's on your heart" makes a man feel like he is stripped of his masculinity.

4) Not enough action. Men want to be active, they don't want to just sit and listen to a long sermon. They want to do things.

5) Men lack spirituality. Several commenters, mostly men, seeme to blame men for lacking spirituality.

6) Need a challenge. This answer came almost exclusively from men. Several men mentioned that men need to be challenged.

7) Music is too feminine. This was another answer given by men themselves. They feel that too many songs are about "loving Jesus" in ways that are very feminine and the lyrics are words men would never say to another man.

I dont think that it's the fact men "hate" as much as it is "why bother?".  Since the focus of "church" is building relationships as opposed to the focus of the Kingdom which is to establish authority in the Earth realm. 

Meaning what?  Men are hard wired to establish and maintain a goal.  In Genesis 2:15 God told Adam to dress and keep the garden.  In Genesis 2:20 He named all the animals.  Even after the rib was removed He named her Woman (Genesis 2:23)  After the fall he renamed her Eve (Genesis 3:20).  If the "end all to be all" of church is to "maintain relationships; "Why Bother?"

Just a thought   

Ephesians 4:11-16
And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes. Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.

I believe that this, and the previously quoted 1 Corinthians 1:27-31, is a key in understanding this issue.  I couldn't disagree more with the assertion of some on Pastor Bob's blog, and here, that the problem is: "2) Overemphasis on relationships." In my thinking that is just an excuse a man has for his "fig leaves."  Men are taught, by the world, to be self-sufficient, and self-dependent.  Our Christian culture tells men that Christianity is basically a matter of will-power and commitment.  Men are taught that being transparent is weakness; that admitting any inability or failure is weakness; that they are supposed to be strong, if they are really a good Christian.  Thus, men are taught to walk by the flesh, in the name of Jesus, and to dominate and control everything, and everyone.  As Jay pointed out, many Pastors are intimidated and threatened by the gifts of others, if another man teaches better, is more anointed in a given area, they are identified as a threat and suppressed and driven off or into total submission.

Relationship, in fact, is everything.  Relationships are the only thing that are eternal!

The corporate entity, that is called "the church," is served rather than the actual people who really are the body of Christ. Every corporate entity has to have a "leader" that has the final word on everything...in general that leader is not in submission to anyone and dominates all the other men and women (it is leadership in exactly the same terms as in the world).  Instead of being the slave of all, this leader is served by all.  And they have a legal right to do so because they are the "president" of the corporate entity.  It is "their" church.  The people are "members" who's only purpose is to bring in people to become "members" too; to sit in the audience while the "professionals" do the "ministry" and to encourage people to enter "the ministry" which is really about serving the corporate entity (with Tithing at the very least) and perhaps starting another one someplace else so it can spread like a virus and perhaps choke out the other corporate entities in the area.  It is actually wrapped in genuine sincerity, but in my opinion it is accompanied by genuine self-deception.  Who really wants to be involved in that?

If you start a "home group," just to have "relationships" with other believers, if it is successful, the leader of that group will be identified as a threat to the corporate entity, and the home group will be eliminated.  The home group leader either submits or is driven off.

It is the rare fellowship where men in leadership are in mutual submission and without one being designated as the "alpha male" that will settle all issues.  When the alpha male fails the corporate entity then fails.  The real church, which is comprised of genuine relationships between members of the body of Christ, is actually unaffected; those relationships are eternal and those people will sacrifice the corporate entity before they will sacrifice their relationships because they genuinely love one another.  :-D In general these relationships tend to be inter-denominational and inter-corporate entity.  [They are the "real" "Church."]

This mostly applies to corporate entities that are non-denominational.  The denominational ones are the same only the "alpha male" is at corporate headquarters.  The Pastors serve the corporate entity, the "members" exist to provide cash to keep the whole thing going...so they have to be entertained so they keep "tithing."  Law is appealed to when the entertainment is sub par.

That's "Craig's Raw Version."  LOL!
Craig

what are the fruits of righteousness.

Well, she may have meant fruit of the spirit, but she said fruit of righteousness. Now I am digging, THANKS A LOT!!! I will be up all night trying figure this out!!!!!!

 Because there are fruits of righteousness, but I can't find what they ARE!!!

I can find where it is said in the Bible.... but no definition as to what they are. THANKS A LOT!!!!

See my new blog on this!  What are the fruits of righteousness

2 Corinthians 9:10, and Philipians 1:11. ARGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!

Didn't have time to read but wanted to give a quick comment...to answer the question...
Men were created by God to be leaders...hard to do with a one-man show that is the norm in most churches.