Wow!  Thanks all, please keep them coming =D

Rich, I have to say I respect any man whose willing to admit a mistake. 

Phrase: "Well you know, all things work for the good for those that love the Lord?"  (This is one of my favorite verses, but used at the wrong time......
Why:  It didn't help because it didn't feel like a good thing to me!
What: "I can't imagine what you are going through, this must be most difficult.  But I will be praying for you, and you have my shoulder to lean on if you need it."

phrase: If you don't like the way things are going here, then you need to move to another church!

Why: This has been said to me from a minister and his wife when a church that we were in split off because they decided to go to total cell groups...It divided the church in half...It wasn't that I wanted to go anywhere, or that I was looking to be confrontational, but I was really concerned about our church at the time. I was instantly shut down and left with the feelings of well Lord, what now?? Unfortunately over half the body left the church.

What: Should have said, we don't want you to leave... We value your family. God led you here, and maybe we need to talk about this. It bugs me that it's so easy to tell your brother and sister in Christ...go somewhere else if you don't like the way we run things here...I hate church politics, but where there is confusion, you know who is in the midst of it all. I respect and uphold our ministers, and was in no way telling them how to do their job, BUT they are not the only ones who have it cornered on hearing from God...We should value people and be inclusive, and let God do the weeding out...

 **I'm sorry, I know this sounds bitter, but it really gets next to me when I hear this...I feel disposable..

Debbye 

Thanks for all your responses! 

When I started this, I meant things I've told or heard from others.  I'm going to open it up to things I've told myself.

Phrase (more of an attitude): "I'm a monster because I'm weak to such and such sin."
Why: Satan's tools are stealing, killing and destroying.  Jesus was so gentle we wouldn't break a bent stick (Isa 42:3).
What: I just pray: "Jesus, this sin is bigger than me.  Please glorify Yourself by how You overcome it in my life."

Isaiah 42:3 

A bruised reed He will not break
  And a dimly burning wick He will not extinguish;
  He will faithfully bring forth justice.

Wow, this is really a good post. So often people say things that really do make it worse. I've learned from single friends what to say and what not to say as comfort, so it's good to know what phrases really can hurt, or at the very least, don't help much.

I have two. 

Phrase: "You need to pray for God's timing."
Why: When people say this, they seem to be assuming that I just jumped into the decision without thinking or praying, and that offends me. By the time I've decided to do something, I've already prayed, fasted, studied the Word, confided in my husband, and asked for prayer.
What: "Have you already prayed about it?" "How would you like me to pray for you?"

Phrase: "He's in a better place."
Why: When my father died 15 years ago, I heard this more times than I can count. I knew he was in a better place. I wasn't crying because I didn't know where he was. I was crying because I would not see him again until heaven. It made me feel like I wasn't supposed to mourn.
What: Just hug me. Let me know you love me and you're there for me. Remind me that one day he and I will dance around God's throne together in bodies that will never die.