Good Grief

In the cartoon strip Peanuts, Charlie Brown often exclaims, “Good grief!” While he may not mean it in the literal sense, he is nevertheless right. Grief can be good. Studies show that those who express their anguish recover more quickly and are healthier as a result.

When Mordecai learned of the terrible fate being planned for his people, he grieved. Furthermore, he showed that grief in the traditional Jewish way–by donning sackcloth and ashes, lamenting loudly. Mordecai was not ashamed to show his sorrow. But neither did he let it sidetrack him. Following his expressions of grief, he took action.

Some Christians equate grief with a lack of faith. To them the unspoken rule is, “If you mourn, then you are implying that God is not good. Instead of grieving,” they say, “just rejoice.” But grief is a part of life, even for the most faithful.

The Bible certainly establishes parameters for our grief. The apostle Paul says, “But I do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning those who have fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have no hope” (1 Thess. 4:13). This verse does not exclude grief but instructs us to hope in the midst of it. Jesus Himself grieved at the tomb of His friend Lazarus (John 11:35) and even shed tears over the city of Jerusalem (Matt. 23:37). Certainly Jesus was not lacking in faith.

If you are grieving today, don’t be ashamed of it. You are not an inferior or faithless Christian because you feel sorrow. Allow yourself the right to grieve, but don’t let grief rule your life.

Grieve, grieve some more, and then get up and get on with your life. Until the day comes when all tears will be wiped away, there’s nothing wrong with “good” grief.

We rejoice in spite of our grief, not in place of it.