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| My Logg Blogg |
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What a fine early Autumn day it is. After reading Mike's and Bev's respective Blogg's on logs, I'm reminded of something I read about humility, concerning shortcomings or sins. That the are like a fungus if we keep them hidden in the dark. they grow.
Jesus sais he is the way the truth and the life. I remember sitting outside my home church a couple of monthes ago thinking about reservations. As in what things would lead me back to trying life on my own. For instance long periods of celibacy, or just plain loneliness.
It seems Christian men are just as prone to be guarded as anyone else. I'm quite sure if I just put on a Sunday go to meeting face and try to bluff my way through this walk with Christ is going to be spotty at best.
Thank God for the Men's group, and our local cell groups.
I know Christ is working with me. I also know I have a lot to learn about being still and knowing that he is God. Having spent a life time of blowing up relationships (meaning my marriage and various other sex relations) some how thinking that the solution to lonelines was in this woman or that woman or with this kind of sex or that kind of sex.
Much of this I admit was fuelled with my first introduction to pornagraphy when I was a kid trying to find and steal some of my Dad's cigarettes. By the way everytime I invited the enemy into my life I took to it like a duck to water. I started smoking one day and by the next day I had a 2 pack a day habit. The first time I tried a drink of beer I was drunk as a skunk in no time and couldn't wait for the hang over to subside so I could do it again.
Since I gave up dope and liquor 18 years ago, Pornography and much of the related anger lingered. To this day I'm not comfortable having a computer in my home, opting to use the public ones in the library. Every time I've tried to fix this in the flesh I find myself becoming a self rightious jerk. I realise many christians are OK with todays movies, and TV but to me most of these things are very much like so much soft core porn.
To me being born again is the only solution. learning to walk in the spirit one baby step at a time. And learning to trust my Christian Brothers. Stumbling every chance I get. Currently I'm learning to walk in a new relm in my prayer life. Asking God what he would want me to pray about. Asking what he wants. Learning to be less mechanical.
A mechanical relationship with Christ shouldn't suprise after 50 years of faking life. Learning to trust I suppose will have to start with Christ. Any way these are some of my biggest Loggs. Am I the only one with these pesky Loggs. |
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| To add a comment to "My Logg Blogg" |
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| September 14, 2007 |
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| you are so right there!!!!! I moved away from the life I had maid fer myself, full o' drugs an girls, toped with a lil more drugs, an girls. I moved in with the only (Natural) family i got left. Well, that got me off dope, now I battle much smaller demonds, but there still demonds!!! And maybe they aint as small as I thought...... aut- oohhh!!! ONLY GOD CAN SAVE ME!!!!!! ---not my pride,er my girls, er my drugs! Not even money !!!! WHAT DO I DO NOW?? Call on Christ, and He will carry me through this!!!! |
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| September 14, 2007 |
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Dave,
I love when you blog. This stuff is just absolutely great!
Whenever I realize that I've gotten rid of junk in my life I too struggle with the "becoming a self rightious jerk." (haha, great line) You know, it is in our (or maybe just my) nature to become SMUG! And I hate that!!
"I realise many christians are OK with todays movies, and TV but to me most of these things are very much like so much soft core porn." .......I pretty much absolutely agree with you about this. We watch very few movies and very little TV. Same with our kids. In fact, I think it's made them happier altogether not to have to do battle with the mindgames that result from too much exposure to television.
"not comfortable having a computer in my home" ..... I fully understand this sentiment too. Anytime you forage onto the internet you run the risk of looking at utter crap -- and a fair amount is tempting to visit. Comcast is especially shameful b/c their main screen always shows sexually charged content in order to drive up the # of clicks. I am wrestling with whether or not to discontinue Comcast for that very reason. I've contacted them about that content, but they just shrugged it off. |
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| September 14, 2007 |
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I don't see very clearly. I think there's a tree or something growing from my eye!  Grace and Peace, Dave!
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| September 14, 2007 |
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| Thanks Jason, and Mike, Kat. |
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| September 15, 2007 |
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Dave, Isn't the man in the photo giving you an award MUSSLIM? GOD Loves him too, so do I Dave, try not to go over board on your "Righteous thing" I love JESUS too, however he has deemed to keep me around a program of recovery, with some pretty sick addicts. I am a believer, reciever, and I am redeemed, ALL FALL SHORT OF THE GLORY, YET WE GIVE THE GLORY TO HIM ANYWAY! With a Servants Heart, Char :-) Oh by the way have you told your sponsees of your retraction from NA? Is it any of my business? Hmmmm. |
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| September 16, 2007 |
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| Thanks Pastor Tim, Thanks Char. BTW Char if you wanna run me up ing the funny's feel free. They Crusified my boss. |
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