25 “Then I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean. Your filth will be washed away, and you will no longer worship idols. 26 And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.^[b] 27 And I will put my Spirit in you so that you will follow my decrees and be careful to obey my regulations.

I've gotten kind of used to the idea of having a calloused heart.  It seems at some point in my life I was responsible at making myself feel good.  I was responsible for guarding my heart.  I learned to use Sex to replace intimacy, but I was terrified to let people really get to know me.  Currently my finances are pretty shabby, I recently cut up some credit cards.  Because I wanted to look successfull.  It occurred to me that how I apear really isn't that important.

Ephesions 4:
17 With the Lord’s authority I say this: Live no longer as the Gentiles do, for they are hopelessly confused. 18 Their minds are full of darkness; they wander far from the life God gives because they have closed their minds and hardened their hearts against him. 19 They have no sense of shame. They live for lustful pleasure and eagerly practice every kind of impurity.

 20 But that isn’t what you learned about Christ. 21 Since you have heard about Jesus and have learned the truth that comes from him, 22 throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. 23 Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. 24 Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy.

Quite frankly the idea of simply following the spirit is new to me.  It's really easy to try and develop my own rightiousness in the flesh and then look down my nose at every one else.  But then I'd close myself off from everyone else in my home church 'cause no one would be living up to my expectations.  Then In time I'd get frustrated 'cause even I couldn't live up to my expectations.

We recently started a men's fraturnity at my home church which has been going on for a couple of weeks now.  I'm really looking forward to opening up and being accountable to some of my brothers.  'cause really this christian walk I don't think was really meant to be trodden alone.

For some reason I'm expecting an influx of people in the church as it gets closer to harvest.  I think we are going to have to be transparent and genuine with one another.