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| For my friend Tim |
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OK,
SoI thought about putting up the drummer jokes, and then I thought about guitar player jokes, then I ran into these and went YES !!!
Banjo jokesQ: How many banjo players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one, but all the others gathered around will complain that that's not the way Earl Scruggs would have done it.
Q: How can you tell the stage you're playing on is level?
A: The banjo player is drooling out of both sides of his mouth.
Q: What is the difference between a banjo and an anchor?
A: You tie a rope to an anchor before you throw it overboard.
Q: Why do so many fishermen own banjos?
A: They make great anchors!
Q: Why did the Boy Scout take up the banjo?
A: They make good paddles.
Q: What is the difference between a banjo and a chain saw?
A: A chain saw has a dynamic range.
Q: What is the difference between a banjo and a chain saw?
A: You can turn off a chainsaw.
Q: What is the difference between a banjo and a South American Macaw?
A: One is loud, obnoxious and noisy; the other is a bird.
Q: What is the difference between a banjo and a Harley-Davidson motorcycle?
A: You can tune a Harley.
Q: What is the difference between a banjo and an Uzi submachine gun?
A: An Uzi only repeats 40 times.
Q: Why does everyone hate a banjo right off?
A: Saves time.
Q: Why is the banjo player a fiddle player's best friend?
A: Without him, the fiddle would be the most hated instrument on earth.
Q: How can you tell the difference between all the banjo songs?
A: By their names.
Q: What is the most seldom heard comment made of banjo players?
A: "Say, isn't that the banjo player's Porsche?"
Q: What do you say to the banjo player in the three piece suit?
A: Will the defendant please rise.
http://www.ahajokes.com/banjo.html
Oh, and MH (Tim) has a few opinions about banjo's......hehehe |
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| I'm so glad you didn't post the drummer jokes...and that I don't play the banjo. |
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Shameful... simply shameful.. ya'll pickin on a bango like that.... what a lil ole bango done to hurt anybody anyway...?
Pastor Aminata |
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Tim you are too crazeeee.. lol
Pastor Aminata |
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| and you do have a plethora of drummer jokes. i bet they sell a book of them on amazon.com. i bet you're going to go look now. ;) |
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Title: Forget the drummer jokes--new research shows drumming builds brainpower.(Product News)
Distributed by Thomson Gale
Excerpt.
"IMPROVED IQ SCORES can now officially be added to the ever-growing list of benefits from playing drums. A recent study shows that playing the drums or other percussion instruments actually improves IQ scores of children. While previous studies have hinted that musical training improves a child's literacy and math skills, this is the first time that a study has shown that one's intelligence level can be improved by drumming."
very nice article you found! had to post that excerpt. Dennis will love that. |
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What do you call a drummer with half a brain?
Gifted.
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Why do drummers have 1/2 ounce more brains than horses?
So they don't disgrace themselves during the parade.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?
A drummer.
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What did the drummer get on his IQ test?
Drool.
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Why do bands have bass players?
To translate for the drummer.
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How can you tell a drummer is walking behind you?
You can hear his knuckles dragging on the ground.
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What's the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?
You only have to punch the information into the drum machine once.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They have machines to do that now.
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Did you hear about the bass player who locked his keys in the car?
He had to break a window to get the drummer out!
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We know a guy who was so dumb his teacher gave him two sticks and he became a drummer, but lost one and became a conductor.
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Two cowboys were waiting in their fort for the Indians to attack. They listened to the distant pounding war drums.
One cowboy muttered to the other, "I don't like the sound of them drums."
Just then, a distant voice came over the hill, "It's not our usual drummer!"
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A guy wanted to play bass in a band. The band told him, "Okay, but you will have to have 1/3 of your brain removed." So the guy went into surgery. When he woke up, the doctor said, "I'm terribly sorry, but we made a mistake and accidentally removed 3/4's of your brain!" The guy said, "Uh, that's okay. Got some sticks?"
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Why are orchestra intermissions limited to 20 minutes?
So they don't have to retrain the drummers.
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How do you know when a drummer is knocking at your door?
The knock always slows down.
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How do you get a drummer to play an accelerando?
Ask him to play in 4/4 at a steady 120 bpm.
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If thine enemy wrong thee, buy each of his children a drum.
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I asked my drummer to spell "Mississippi"...
He said, "the river or the state?"
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How do you know if a drummer's platform is level?
The drool comes out of both sides of his mouth.
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How do trumpet players park in the handicap spots?
They put drumsticks on the dash.
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