| I just don't care anymore |
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I just don't care anymore, I don't care about the words that go through my mouth... I don't care about how I feel each morning because I already know negativity is coming my way. It annoys me to the point that I feel useless to myself, useless to everyone around me. All I really want is to be high... I want to be that higher being. It's just blind... I can't seem to see myself as being that higher being anymore... It puts me into that stage of isolation. Like I feel unimportant, Like I feel like no matter how hard I try, there is no way for me to be perfect. It's a good reason to stop now. Stop now, because it's not good to get hurt. That's not the whole purpose of living a good life. You may not know what I mean by all of this but all I can say is look away. If you don't believe, then just don't believe, and you won't have to do anything to do with me. It's just better to keep it simple. I may be talking gibberish right now, but it's like this for a reason. It's like this because I'm just writing and not taking the time to think before I write. It takes things to that higher level. It's another reason to be happy with who I am and not even care about how others feel about me.
I'm just tired right now, I feel as if I haven't slept in days. Last night I got home at 1:25am but it's ok, that's the time I normally go to sleep, excluding the amount of times I wake up and go back to sleep in the middle of the night. Yes, it's plural not singular, "Times". I feel like just falling into a nice soft bed and just sleeping away... dreaming and hopeing that could be like my life, excluding the amount of times I get chased around by enemies in my dreams/nightmares, excluding the amount of times people try to hurt me and kill me in my dreams/nightmares. Yes I get a nightmare almost every night. It's who I am. It's how I interpret the world in my mind. The world is sick, it's a place of torture and dispair. It's horrible and sadistic. It's a reason why I should not be getting chased by mr. or mrs. negativity each and everyday. That's just the blunt and simple truth about the way I feel.
Do me a favor and go think... think and just dream. Like I said again... these words are not thought of before I wrote them. They just came out as they are. Unedited too. |
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