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Good morning guys.How r u all doing?Sorry it's been a while since I've been busy I guess.Just a note to let u all know that I'm doing fine.That God's healing me in a lot of areas and I'm being set free of alot of things.Thanx for all ur prayers and support.I have a support now and they r praying for me for God's healing power to flow over me and to heal all my hurts and pains from the past.
I was putting up a wall and it was think but the other night I couldn't hold it up any longer.The flood gates opened and there was breakthru.They say that tears r healing and boy did I cry.I've put up walls and found it very hard to let the tears flow.But the other night I couldn't stop.i felt so much rejection from my mom and others that I just put up the wall.Not letting anybody in that could hurt me.Unfortunately that keeps out all the ppl who want to help me too.So I feel better that I can open up with this woman who God placed in my life to help me.
See i missed my bestfriend for so long.She was my mentor as well.But she moved and we talked for a while long distance as friends.But now she doesn't serve the Lord anymore.I pray for her to come back to Him soon.But there has been no contact other then on facebook every few months.I missed her and found it hard to really open up with someone again.It wasn't just that.But I'm moarning the lose of that friendship.It was a deep relationship very close for me.I've never closer to anyone ever before.
Anyway,I'm greaving over that.But God has put someone else in my life to help me with what God wants to do in me now.God has blessed me with a wonderful woman now that is praying for me everyday.I'm really blessed with someone who loves me that much and who is obedient to God.Enough that she didn't give up on me when I tried to push her away.Cause the areas that she was touching (Spiritually & Emotionally)were hurting me and making me feel so uncomfortable.I know now that I can tell her just about anything and she won't look down on me.I was afraid before but now I'm ok.Thank u God for this great person in my life.
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Thank U God for the light to my path or I'd be lost in the dark.I'm so glad that God is with me no matter how bad it gets.No matter how many times I mess up He's always there for me to turn to.He's alwasy there to rescue me when I get trapped in a hole too deep to climb out of by mysefl.When I run away to try to do it my way.Cause I think my way is easier or I know better then He does.When I think that I can run my own life and don't need Him today.I can remember a poem that goes something like this but I'm not sure exactly how it goes:
This is God speaking.Good morning my child I will be in charge of ur life for today and u can just relax and I will take care of every one of ur needs for today.U don't have to worry about anything as I am in control.I just want u to know that I will be there to catch u if u fall or need direction for toady.I know the plans that I have for u today and if u'll just trust me all will go well with u today.I want u to know just how much I love u.
I'm not sure if I got it all right but I'm sure u get the picture of what wants from us.That's to trust Him with this one day.So God here I am.I know that my day is over half done.But I hope that it's not to late to let u have control of the rest of my day.I trust u and know that u have the best in mind for my todays.God use me today to bless someone.Even though right now i may not feel like being much help to anyone today.Even though right now I feel so down that I don't know how to get up.Please send someone that I can help or encourage today.There must be someone out there that feels worse then I today.I've been told that no matter where we find ourselves in life there is always someone worse off then we r.So God help me be a blessing to someone in this world today.Thank U God for the blessings that u give me everyday.The food I eat cause there's ppl who didn't eat today.For the roof over my head cause there's someone sleeping in the park tonight that would love to have my bed for one night.For my clothes(and laudry room to keep them clean)cause there's someone who has no clothes to where or shoes either.Thank U Godfor all of the things that I have that so many ppl don't have.
I like the saying:"I complained that I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet.".
God help me stop complaining about what I don't have and start thank U for what I do have.I may not have the money to buy all that I need.But thatnk God I have the money to pay the rent and buy some food.Thank God that there r foodbanks and soup kitchens for me to go to when I run out of food.In some countries they don't eat for weeks.they r not as blessed as we r.Thank u God I don't have to go searching thru the garbage to find my next meal or stuff to sell to get a niclel or dime to feed my family with.
I'm thankful that I can walk even if it's with a walker right now.I'm loosing weight.I'm thankful cause my mom just lost a leg a few months ago and she will never walk again.I'm thankful that I can still walk I mean.My mom almost lost her other leg and God saved it.I believe tha God is healing my family."As for me and my house we will serve the Lord".Thank U for Ur light on me today Lord.God bless all that read this blog.Bless them abundantly in every area fo there lives.
119:105 Thy word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.
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Well I must say that I'm still not on track with the wisdom that I need.I seem to be building my house on the wrong foundation.Please keep me in prayer that I'll start building on the rock.Thanx.
7:24 "Every one then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house upon the rock; 7:25 and the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat upon that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. 7:26 And every one who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house upon the sand; 7:27 and the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell; and great was the fall of it."
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The word says that if anyman lacks wisdom he should ask God who gives to all men.
Well i lack wisdom and I may ask God for it.But my problem is that I haven't been listening to the wisdom that God gave me.So here I am asking God to forgive me for wondering away again.Please help me to use the God given wisdom that U have given me Lord to be smarter the next time.We all know that the time is getting short for the Lord's return.There is no more time to fool around with sin.So my question is why do I or anybody else keep doing it.I know that I'm week in certain areas.I fall back into it easily.But God in temptation always provides a way out.So God help me and any others here to listen to the way out that u have provided us when we r tempted.Thank U God for ur mercy and ur grace.Please forgive us all for fall away.
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Well the word also says that if any man lacks wisdom he should ask God.God gives to us even when we don't deserve it.I know that right now I lack wisdom.To get out of this pit I find myself in.I had no problem getting caught in here.I had a youth pastor say once "Choose ur rutts wisely u'll be in them for the next 2000 miles."He was a really smart man.See I make mistakes and let myself stew over them.I remind myself of them every day even though God has forgiven me.
I's like to have the wisdom to get up once I've gotten down.I'd like to have the wisdom and confidence in God that He really does love me and forgives me.I was taught that when u mess up it takes a long time for someone to forgive u.They never forget about.And often they will bring it up to u when they want to control and manipulate u.So I thing that God is the same way.Even though we r taught in church that He is a forgiving God.How does a person reckon that out in their minds and heart?How do u let what u've done go under the blood when others bring it up(or the devil's always reminding me all the time).When u r tempted to go back to that kinda life.Since everyone thinks that who and what u r anyway.
I know this sounds like a downer.It wasn't meant to be.I saw that it was talking about wisdom.I remembered the other verse also.I know that right now I lack wisdom and even the will power to get out of this mess.I also have a weight problem.I was loosing weight and then this thing happened in my life.I've been eating emotionally again.I can't seem to get over it.Please pray for me in this area.I need wisdom and power to overcome in these areas.I want to be happy and to loose weight.Ppl say "JUST DO IT".These ppl obviously have never had a weight problem or they would see what a struggle it is to eat right.Or when dealing with depression how hard it is to get up and make the effort to change a behaviour.I justy need wisdom and a little encouragement from God to get up and do this not just for Him but for me also.
2:20 Daniel said: "Blessed be the name of God for ever and ever. to whom belong wisdom and might. 2:21 He changes times and seasons; he removes kings and sets up kings; he gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to those who have understanding; 2:22 he reveals deep and mysterious things; he knows what is in the darkness, and the light dwells with him. 2:23 To thee, O God of my fathers, I give thanks and praise, for thou hast given me wisdom and strength, and hast now made known to me what we asked of thee, for thou hast made known to us the king's matter."
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