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it is hard bobby. i fine i try to indulge in self-pity often. then i realize how blessed i am and how bad things could be. and i ask God often "what is going on" sometimes i just dont understand the pain and suffereing. but i have to stand on faith. i love God. and i have to continue to follow Him...even though i don't understand. what choice do i have? He is my saviour.
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